Who else is fed up with hearing that phrase? Who else is sick to death of that “holier than thou” attitude of some of our “top” footballing heroes and commentators? Who else is tired of hearing the same contradictory, patronising, agenda driven drivel from SkyTVisf**kings**t? Who else is hacked off with the bare faced cheek of the rank hypocrisy from these old footballing treasures? It’s just not how we do things here……? No. It’s more of a case of do as I say, not do as I do. If karma ever does come to them, they would find that eventually those who live in glass houses would be showered by an avalanche of boulders.

In fact, in the last 10 days we have been subject to some of the most terrifically bad on field decisions that some of “leading teams in Britain” fielding some of “the best footballers in the world” have duped the officials into. But of course, this is done “in the spirit of the game”, our beautiful game. Because these “professional” fouls, diving incidents in the penalty box, shirt pulling in the penalty area when taking corners and free kicks, appealing for free kicks and throw ins when it is clearly NOT the correct decision, feigning injury, blatant time wasting (game management according to the mealy mouthed pundits on SkyTVisf**kings**t) etc. is NEVER done by any player in the Premier League, because… it’s just not how we do things in this country, apparently.  It’s just these foreign managers, who don’t know the “proper” rules, who don’t understand how “we” play football in this country. After all, there are no managers in the Premier League who would ever blame a loss on the refereeing decision…. Unthinkable that the ref would ever be used as a scapegoat for a crap performance. It’s just not the done thing in this country.

Take the VAR decision against PSG. That was ball to hand everytime. The ball was never destined to go anywhere near the goal. Take the penalty decision at the Emirates on Sunday when Fred elbowed Lacazette in the back, that was a soft penalty if I have ever seen one. In fact, it was so soft, that koala bear hugging onto those toilet rolls would be positively asleep in it within seconds. As much as I hate Cardiff, they deserved to beat West ham, purely for the sole reason that Hernandez is a diving cheat. Not to mention all those appalling high challenges which littered just about every single game. Some of them potentially career ending tackles, but most brushed under the carpet under the guise of “gutsy challenges”. Not many were actually mentioned, let alone rewound and replayed on Match of The Day by Mr Squeaky Clineker (who has never put a foot wrong of course).  The only replays were the new “players view” angles, which were basically another tool to fool the viewer and only show what they want you to see. Not called the Biased Broadcasting Company for nothing!

When it comes to the Premier League, and I suppose, in some ways, the Championship, it is clear who the flavours of the month are. It is clear who they prefer to devote the majority of the airtime to. It is easy to see through the thinly disguised post match interview questioning in order to provoke a response. Hence why Bielsa has to be congratulated for treating them with the contempt that they so deserve.

At the head of it all are the grey, double breasted suited, jobs for the boys dinosaurs that are in charge of the FA and the EFL. The ones who are responsible for all that is wrong about the game, our beautiful game, in England. However long they are in charge, our football will never get any better.

There was a little light humour however.

This weekend, in a spectacular faux pas that can only ever be of the scale attributed to that of the EFL, a statement was released by them stating that they condoned the actions that occurred on the pitch in the second city derby. One can only assume this is Shaun Harvey’s parting shot or whoever wrote it was Shaun Harvey’s second in command. It was altered but only after it was captured on social media for all and sundry to see. After all, nothing is ever truly deleted on social media.

Now there is a big hoo ha about the “safety of players” after the events at Birmingham and in Scotland. This subject will be left to the next blog. Let’s just enjoy the moment we have…

The first time I heard the phrase “passive aggressive” was in The Smurfs film in 2011. Passive Aggressive Smurf, however, did not actually surface until the sequel in 2013. He was described by Smurfette as a nice Smurf but he always leaves you feeling bad when finish talking to him.

For the benefit of those of you who have not seen The Smurfs Movie, and those who don’t understand what “passive aggressiveness” is, I will try to explain this relatively new phenomenon, and what it’s relevance is.

Passive Aggressive (according to the Oxford Dictionary https://en.oxforddictionaries.com/definition/passive-aggressive )

ADJECTIVE

• Of or denoting a type of behaviour or personality characterized by indirect resistance to the demands of others and an avoidance of direct confrontation.

Ok. So what does that mean? And why am I so bothered about it?

Initially, I was going to call this article “Rise Of The Superfan” like Rise Of the Foot Soldier, as it too started with football (as opposed to the crime, violence, murderous intent and drug trafficking which it finished with – watch the first film, the other two weren’t so good). Once I started writing however, I realised that what I am describing is simply a sad indictment of the times that we are living in. A incogniscent society where people happily hide behind their little safety shield of the hashtag, not revealing their real identity and not accepting any personal responsibility for their 140 characters of  indirect confrontational attention seeking.

It has become the socially acceptable norm now, for people behind their hashtag safety curtain to spout self righteous drivel in order to set their own little power dynamic going. I wish I could just blame it on the snowflake millenial generation, but even the older ones are doing it now. Some of these are well educated individuals, with sensible and responsible jobs or positions and families who would be shocked at their language. But once that little blue bird takes over, all the common sense flies out of the window.

Once those little piggies start tippy tappying, the whole of the universe gets put aside in the tirade of self absorbed blustering conflabulation. After all everyone is entitled to my opinion.

So what has this got to do with football, I hear you say?

I was sent a Twitter screenshot of someone calling someone else a “Superfan”. But Superfan wasn’t meant in the nice normal way, like in Superman or Super sized or Super Duper. When I think of Super, I think of something as being first class, outstanding, excellent, marvellous, magnificent etc. But the context that this word “Superfan” was being used was actually in a derogatory manner. It actually read that being a “Superfan” meant that you were in some way glorifying or basking in the limelight of being haughtily more superior than any other fan. The context in which it was used implied that a “Superfan” was actually something not very good at all.

The context was, believe it or not, getting away tickets… yes that old chestnut.

The less than 140 character whinge was basically stating anyone should be allowed to get an away ticket, regardless of the length of time that they had been “supporting” Leeds United. Contentious issue – yes. The discussion about how “loyal” someone is rarely makes any sense. Especially when the conversation is between people who have spent most of their entire lives/money/time traipsing up and down the country versus people who have only decided to come to a game since we have started to play well.

Truth hurts doesn’t it?

In the true spirit of this piece on passive aggressiveness, I should be saying “Sorry – not sorry” (I think).

This is passive aggressiveness. Where the way that some speaks to you, or indeed writes, although in the literal sense is ok, actually is quite the opposite and it leaves you with the impossible task of working out what the appropriate response should be. It’s all a bit uncomfortable. The tone is purposefully confrontational. It’s deliberately done to demand a response, but because it is indirect, how do you respond?

My initial response was F*** Off, you thick as s**t bandwagon jumper, but I calmed down quickly as I know that once I resort to name calling, the argument is lost.

I realised that this wasn’t the first time I had heard the phrase “Superfan”.

We all know about “celebrity” Leeds fans. That bloke from James, the one from Stereophonics, the one from the Office, Father Dougal, Colin Montgomerie and most of the Swedish tennis players in the 90s. We also know of Leeds fans who have written books, risked being interviewed on the telly or on the radio (without fearing that their words are twisted or edited to achieve the broadcasters aims) and the other familiar faces who turn up, week in, week out to games or those who come over from Ireland and Scandinavia etc. when they can and everyone turns out to say hello. Basically, just your normal fans then.

And then there are those who are on social media 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, constantly seeking reassurance, by telling other people that they “really are fans”, that they are fans. Strangely enough, these people never existed in the 90’s and 2000’s, did they? Even in the heady days of The Champions League when we sold out to crowds of 38,000 plus, I can’t remember hearing a peep out of them. Where have they been in the last 10 years? Bizarre, isn’t it? Even with the old “Bates Out/Cellino Out/Orta Out” movements over the last 5 years or so, there has been little sight or sound of these “fans”. These, dear Readers, I have decided, in my opinion, are the ones who have elevated themselves to the giddy heights of Superfandom.

The fact is that the people who have dedicated their lives to following Leeds United are NOT “Superfans”. We are just normal fans. Normal fans who travel home and away to watch Leeds. In the case of those fans who can’t get to games, the ones who have a “no go” zone around them and the telly/computer/laptop/radio (delete as appropriate) from kick off until the final whistle blows.

There is nothing “super” about these people. This is what football fans do and have always done since the beautiful game came about.

To spell it out: Fans – short for fanatics.

Fanatic (according to the Oxford Dictionary https://en.oxforddictionaries.com/definition/fanatic)

NOUN

• 1 A person filled with excessive and single-minded zeal, especially for an extreme religious or political cause.

  ‘religious fanatics’

  More example sentences

  Synonyms

  1. 1.1 informal A person with an obsessive interest in and enthusiasm for a particular activity.
     ‘a fitness fanatic’

Most Leeds United fans can be described as being filled with excessive single-mindedness about watching the team, and do have an obsessive interest or enthusiasm. Most of us would give an arm and a leg to go watch the team, supporting them, getting behind the team and the coach 100%, never booing them off the pitch, staying to the final whistle, whatever the day of the week, whatever the time of the day, 1st team, reserves and the youth team.

Here is the polarizing comment, drum roll please…… not all Leeds United fans are as fanatical as the next.

Not all Leeds United fans can turn up anytime, any place, anywhere (like a Martini…look it up younger readers). Not all Leeds United fans actually go and watch the team at Elland Road, let alone away (especially not these last few games). Not all Leeds United fans would sacrifice their jobs, money, family time and health to follow Leeds. Some have higher priorities, like putting food on the table or keeping a roof over their heads. I completely commend them and I cannot, and will not, pass judgement on these people.

I do know people that can, and do, however. I do know people that have completely dedicated their lives to Leeds United, with single-minded zeal, obsessive interest and enthusiasm over the last half a century. The same faces who I see at most games, bringing their kids and their grandkids, their nephews and nieces and other halves over the years. The same ones who bring along friends, and friends’ friends and their families spreading the Leeds United gospel. The same ones who when they disappear abroad, still try to come back to the odd game or two. The same ones who aren’t from these shores, but love Leeds United so much they come to every game they can.

I am pretty sure fans followed Leeds United relentlessly around the country (and the world) through the 50s, 60s, 70s, 80s, 90s and 2000s but thanks to the absence of social media, only their friends and fellow supporters knew about it. Following Leeds United is not a new thing. It is and was the DONE thing, and no one ever needed to make a song and dance about it, until now of course. This is what it was like that before the advent of social media and how it will be once the likes of Twitter etc. have left this mortal coil. Being a Leeds United fan is NOT a new thing.

Publicly declaring how much of a Leeds United fan you are, well that is a new thing.

Not considering other fans feelings when you are publicly declaring how much of a fan you are, that is a new thing.

Telling people that they don’t deserve to continue to watch the Club they love and have devoted their lives to for the last 40 years, that is a new thing.

Telling people that just because they have given up most of their life following Leeds United, it doesn’t make them any better than you, that is a new thing.

Telling people that you deserve a ticket over the people who have spent years slowly, painfully and patiently building up their loyalty by going to the crap midweek long away games in the middle of winter, when no one else will go, that is a new thing. Yes – that is how everyone starts!

Assuming that the number of “likes” and “smiley faces” you receive when you are typing your nonsense makes you a better person, that is a new thing.

Checking on your device every 2 minutes, desperate for your dose of positive reinforcement “smiley face” or “thumbs up” gratification, that is a new thing.

Thinking you have the right to be abusive and resorting to name calling to get your own way, like a spoilt child, that is a new thing.

Thinking that you have the right to dismiss others because you shout the loudest (or TYPE IN CAPITALS), that is a new thing. (ok – not new, everyone hates a gobs**te)

Here endeth the passive aggressiveness.

As it says in The Disclaimer, you are free to stop reading this at any time (especially if you feel hurt by my words). No one is making you do anything right now. You can fume all you like and then block me or my posts. I really don’t care.

What I care about is the sad truth that I (and many of my friends) am being stopped from doing what I have done for more than half my lifetime, by people who basically have come along for the ride. Todays highlight at Elland Road, “You’re in my seat mate” , “No, these are our seats” , “I’m not asking you, I’m telling you – that’s my season ticket seat”. Says it all doesn’t it?

I know there are some moderates in the Twitteratti and Noseybook Land, but there are also some right idiots, this is aimed at them.

I was following Leeds United when we were crap in the 80s, when we got better in the 90s, when we over achieved in the 2000s and then fell flat on our arses halfway through. I was there in the dark days of Division 3 football and I am here now. I will be still here next season, and the season after and long after the rest of you part timers have cleared off, chasing down your next glory seeking project.

The time for mincing words has long passed.

I will Always be Leeds, I will Always be Loyal.

Where were you when we were crap? Not just in the last ten years either, where were you at Preston, Villa, Cardiff and Hull last season?

I can tell you where you weren’t.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Here’s to hoping that this will be the last word on this subject, but obviously the Leeds United hate mob on BBC Look North have yet to summarise on the Monday evening football round up, so we will just have to wait and see 6.30pm tomorrow night.

After this morning’s rather refreshing snippet on SkyTVisf**kings**t’s Sunday Supplement, I live in hope that the hysteria on Friday and Saturday will have finally died down. When the dust settles and SkyTVisf**kings**t’s carefully orchestrated pre-match build up is finally revealed as the cheap attempt to get viewing figures up, that it was, the truth will out.

It is a sad state of affairs when something like this is used as a soundbyte and manipulated so badly that even the washed up hasbeens that they dragged out to tow the party line are sweating so much, it looked like they’d had twelve rounds with Josh. No amount of make up is ever going to get that shine off your forehead, Keith.

Apparently even the Rozzers had put out a tweet that showed someone sat in the back of a police van. What happened to innocent until proven guilty? What happened to right to privacy? What happened to confidentiality? On an even more serious note, what crimes were not being dealt with, whilst the Derby constabulary were sent to the training ground on an errand of “something really important?”

The sad fact is that as soon as the news broke, SkyTVisf**kings**t and the (tax payer funded) BBC just could not help themselves. There was no way they would not jump on this opportunity to bump up the ratings. You can see the “kerching” dollar signs and Pulitzer prize eye balls flicking furiously along with the slobbering jowls of sports editors. Not until the hysteria had dampened, after they had speed-dialled every single old player/manager at whistle stop speed to get their “reactions”, did someone realise that they should really have checked their information.

By then it was too late, the damage had been done and all they could do was hope that no one would bring up Fergie sending drones to the Blue side of the city in 2009 and that they was no evidence of what Mourinho got Villa Boas to do (whilst Lampard was at Chelski). The beauty of social media though is that nothing ever gets deleted for good and sure enough, the pictures of articles and tweets etc. were swiftly put up on Facebook, twitter etc. to remind folk that the truth is out there.

To save face, none of this was mentioned in dispatches, as of course, no one likes to be told that they are wrong. So the perpetuation continued until Charlie Nicholas, on the programme which was directly after the Leeds v Derby game, unbelievably (Jeff), said it was going on in his day. Ouch!

As I see it, the only good thing to come out of this will be that in the run up to the January transfer window, SkyTVisf**kings**t will have to choose their words very wisely. The norm is that they have reporters, standing outside training grounds, trying to look into cars and over walls etc in the last week of January, waiting for “the sensational latest news”. All you hear is the phrase “reports from Sky Sports sources is…” or “we have inside information from sources at the Clubs…” . It is on 24 hours a day, 7 days a weeks if you have the Sky Sports 409 news channel on in the background through January. You also get it on Sky news on their sports updates.

Who are these “sources”? Is this not just the same as some bloke looking over a wall at Derby?

 

credits to John Takai at Dreamstime.com for the photo via googleimages

Those of you who know me well, know of my admiration of the great Brian De Palma. One of my favourite films is the epic, The Untouchables. Not just for the cinematography of the sweeping Chicago skyline. Nor for the attention to detail of the costumery by Giorgio Armani. Not even for that fantastic Oscar winning performance by Sean Connery and his perfect delivery of that tremendous Irish accent. No, it has to be for the classic one liners. One of my favourite ones (see the picture below) is – “never stop fighting til the fight is over”  Eliot Ness to Capone in the final courtroom scene. Never stop until it is done.

And that is what happened today, and at Villa on Sunday. Never stop until it is over.

I have just been watching the Red Button version of our game on SkyTVis f**kings**t. When Roofe makes it 2-2 he runs straight back to the centre circle, shouting for everyone else to restart the game. When Roofe scores the winner, Bielsa can be seen on the touchline screaming for everyone to get back to the centre circle, for ANOTHER goal. None of this sitting back on your laurels business. None of the wild celebrating thinking you have won the game (like Blackburn – ha ha ha ha ha). No.  Back to business. Back to scoring another goal.

If Blackburn hadn’t spent so long wasting time in vain doing their inglorious celebrations, who knows? There may not have been so much injury time, and we may not have been able to score the winner.

So you’d think everyone would be happy following the last two games. The last two games where EVERY man played til the end, fighting for that win. Two of the most exciting games of football this Christmas. Two games where we turned it around, clawing back to victory from certain defeat. Two games when we were foiled by the ref and the linesmen at every turn. Everything against us (including the post and the crossbar). Against all odds, we won. We are unbeaten in 7, 7 wins in a row since the minor blip at West Brom.

22 year old Bailey Peacock Farrell had kept 3 clean sheets against Reading (including THAT penalty save), T’Blades and Bolton. He is still learning his trade. Alioski is still only in his second season playing in this league, battling not only a different style of football, but also being played in different positions on the pitch, sometimes covering as a left back. Between them, they probably make the same number of mistakes as Hernandez and Jansson do.  Unlike Pablo and Pontus however, BPF and Alioski get mercilessly boo-ed when they do something wrong. Leeds fans just don’t ever learn. Look at what all the constant booing and aggro did to Roofe when he first came to the Club. It knocked his confidence to rock bottom. It’s only thanks to Bielsa and sheer persistence that Roofe is what he is today, our top goal scorer. 5 goals in 4 games. According to BBC website he has scored 13 goals this season. It’s not even 2019 yet and he spent a month out injured.

At 1-2 down today, people were leaving in their droves. The day trippers who haven’t been to a Leeds game in ages sloping off, muttering “same old sh*te again”, you just couldn’t hold out could you? And, in the words of the great Jim Bowen, let’s look at what you could have won.. 2 goals in injury time, yet another turnaround. So the question is.. why would you? If you have paid your money and saved up all those brownie points all year from your missus and the kids, so you can go watch Leeds for one game, why leave before the end? The mind boggles.

The criticism wasn’t just from them though. Even as we were walking away from the ground, all you could hear was, “we need a decent keeper and a proper forward”. Eh? What game were you watching? We are top of the league. We have a massive goal difference. 7 wins on the trot. Jeez, what would they be saying if we were midtable and only two goals to the good? They’d be wanting two goalies, two forwards and a whole midfield.  I shudder to think what people would be saying if we were bottom of the league, battling relegation. There would be some sort of apoplectic crisis going on every week, liken to some mushroom cloud nuclear explosion, wanting to clear out the whole team…

Hang about that was the end of last season wasn’t it? Good job we didn’t sell all our players in June then, eh??

Even if we bought Messi, I still wouldn’t play him in this team. We are a unit. Not just a team of 11. We are a squad of 18. A gang of 25+. A side of 50+ including the youth and academy. This is our future. If things aren’t going well on the pitch, Bielsa will change it. Or at least threaten to change it by making Lewis Baker stand on the touchline! We do not need mercenary journeymen like we did in the days of Colin. We need to invest in what we have got. We are already the envy of most of the league, and indeed the Premiership. Constant whingeing about needing to bring more in is beyond ridiculous.

No one else could have done what we did today in the last 10 minutes of that game. Even Norwich, the crown princes of the 95+ minutes goals, could not do what we did today AND against Villa on Sunday (with one day less recovery time thanks to SkyTVisf**kings**t). I wouldn’t drop any of them. You don’t fix what isn’t broken. Yes, Cooper is out, as is Beradi and Bamford, and Izzy Brown has yet to kick a ball in anger. But I wouldn’t sideline any of our team, not whilst they can fight back like they did these last two games. Bielsa knows that he can make each player compete for their spot. He is willing to change the team at the time if he thinks it is necessary. He subbed Kalvin a few times and look at the lad now. One of the best players we have on the pitch, and still playing out of position. Talk about a utility player. We have been beset with injuries all season long, but we are top of the league. In the face of adversity ( and time wasting cheating teams and ridiculous reffing decisions), we are prevailing.

Keep the faith. Never, never stop fighting til the fighting is done. We rest when the fight is over. On On On

It’s Christmas, let’s spread a bit of Christmas cheer.

We have loads of things to be happy about, which is a rarity when you are a Leeds United fan. There’s just so many positives right now, it’s hard to find where to start…let’s see (in no particular order)

WGUAFC

Calm down, if we win on Sunday, we are safe from relegation for another year. Let’s just put it into perspective. Last season under TC, we had a really good run, although you’d never have thought that given the comments on unsocial media. It was only really after Ayling got taken out by Bridcutt (remember him?) at Forest that day and our injury list took hold that we started having problems. Plus then there was that little matter of fielding a terrible side and yielding to a lower league team in the cup that ground us to a halt. Yes, no one likes to be reminded of their mistakes, but we need to look back at our mistakes to go forward into the future. Like I said earlier this season, I’ll be happy with going up in second but with a decent cup run.

We are tip top, tippety top, top of the league

There is no need to put any stats up about how many times the team at the top of the league at Christmas is promoted, I’ll leave that to other sites. It is interesting though that the Scousers are currently sitting top of Division 1, and as usual Jamie Carragher is needing a nine pack of Andrex bog rolls, in an effort to curtail his excitement. There is something similar for that league in the last decade, in that the teams at the top at Christmas, have inevitably been champions, apart from Arsenal in 2007/08 (injury curse again)… and yes, you’ve guessed it, Liverpool in both 08/09 and 13/14. Could it be 3rd time lucky for the Bin Dippers? Better not be, seeing as my fantasy league team is basically built round Manchester City.

Burton are in the Semi finals of the League Cup

In the words of the great Jim Bowen, “let’s take a look at what you could have won”. I can’t stand Burton. I was ecstatic that they got relegated because having to fight to the death to get tickets for  that sh****y little excuse for a ground again would have seen me off. The only good thing about it was the fact that they served red wine in the stands, which kept me nice and warm. Dirty team of thugs who played us off the park. Grudges aside for a moment (you don’t hear me saying that very often), they did what any lower league club aspires to do every year, they scored the “Glamour Tie”, Manchester City. They’ll be rolling in the moolah after that. Enough to keep the vultures away for another season at least. I bet the Ipswiches and Boltons of this world are looking back in anger, and I reckon the Wendies will be diving down the back of the settee looking for pennies soon. The fact that Burton saw off Boro in the process makes it even funnier, and if Boro end up failing to get promoted again (hopefully), I will laugh at Pulis and Ayala. The antithesis of proper football – antifootball

SkyTVisf**kings**t is gaining momentum

Let’s all take a moment to laugh. Hahahahahaha. I watched the Forest v Derby game, and even they were singing it. In fact, not only was the “turning down the volume” tactic used, but it also sounded like they played some extra crowd noise over it. Like they used to put canned laughter on the TV shows in the 70s if they weren’t very funny. How very marvellous! Up to and including Villa, Leeds United have been on the telly 15 times this season (I think). That’s more than any other club in the EFL 72 and Division 1. Probably more than Cardiff and Huddersfield have been on, added together and multiplied by 5 – only joking – but you get the gist of it. Bonus for anyone in Oz, USA and the Far East, not so good for anyone who had planned out their holidays when the fixture list came out in June.

Patrick Bamford has got his scoring boots back

Now that he is fit (finally), within five minutes of coming on, he scored against Bolton. It was a scrappy affair, but a win is a win. 3 points is 3 points, no matter how you get them.

Leeds United were awarded a penalty!!

Our last penalty had been October 14th 2017, when Pablo ( in one of his worse runs of form) toe poked the ball straight to the keeper. But when Kemar Roofe wrestled the ball from Pablo’s clutches at home against QPR on 8th December, I knew we had turned the corner. Actually I didn’t, but I was so relieved Roofe was taking it, it was almost like we had scored anyway. I haven’t heard if the referee that day, Peter Banks, is still alive and kicking, but one of the QPR fan websites was calling him Mr Guessit, so they clearly aren’t happy with him. It doesn’t matter anyway, we scored, McLaren moaned (nothing new there then) and we won. If we have to wait that long again for another one, so be it.

They’ve given up with the yellow cards and penalties for fouls in the box when taking corners and free kicks

We were never going to get a penalty from these situations anyway, this is just for Beradi’s sake when he gets back in the team

Bielsa

Enough said. The End

 

 

 

 

Skytvisf**kings**t turns out is actually a great combination of characters for a password. It is probably the only good thing about it. I tell a lie, when it is sung, it forces them to turn the volume down and apologise for any bad language that anyone may have been offended over. Anything that forces them into making an apology is something to be applauded, so long live Skytvisf**kings**t!

I just need to acknowledge, I am well aware that there are many Leeds fans who are ecstatic that Leeds United are on telly, because otherwise they would never get to see them. I know that there are fans who live in Oz, the USA and the Far East etc. who without a doubt would trade in their nearest and dearest to be at a live game, but geographically find it impossible to do so. I know that there is an army of Leeds United season ticket holders (some of them first time season ticket holders at that) and platinum/gold/silver members who don’t stick a chance of ever getting to an away game who benefit from it. When we get promoted and the away allocation is EVEN less, there will be a lot more people who won’t get to see us play away.

It doesn’t make up for the fact that we, the paying fans, are basically slaves to the television gods though.

Having said that, the rescheduling of the game at Wendies on Friday night did have some perks. It spared us the ridiculous RVP (rendezvous point for those of you who don’t travel to games by coach) along that stretch of hard shoulder as you come off the motorway. It spared the annual blushes of people who are forced to use the outdoor facilities because the coaches aren’t allowed to move on until the man from Del Monte says yes.  It spared us the delaying tactics of  South Yorkshires’ finest to escort us to Hillsborough in the snails pace crawl that we normally endure. Thankfully, if there is anything that the rozzers are afraid of, it is the thought that Friday night rush hour on the M1 becomes more of a nightmare than it normally is. Because you certainly don’t want to be late home for your tea, do you?

After trying my hardest to stay awake for the Premiership clash of the titans that was Cardiff v Burnley on Sunday (failed by the way), I know why Skytvisf**kings**t show us all the time. The game was as dull as ditchwater. Hardly the cauldron of excitement that you get at our games, more like a pot of gruel slowly, stodgily plip plopping away, matched by their midfield actually.  It obviously didn’t warrant most of the Burnley and Cardiff fans to turn up either, as there were massive gaps in the ground. Skytvisf**kings**t must have realised that most people would have been watching the golf, so chose to show the dullest game that they could, in order to fulfil their Premiership obligations, so they could justify the poor viewing figures. Luckily, I recorded the Wendies game, seeing as I was stood right behind a huge pillar (for a paltry £39 plus £1 bates tax) and struggled to see most of the game anyway. Yes, I had to put up with the prematch build up with Jimmy Floyd Piggybank, but that’s what the fast forward button is for. And, I only did it to see Marcelo’s legendary pre match interviews, but Skytvisf**kings**t have now cottoned onto the fact that Bielsa is basically taking the p*ss, and the spoilsports won’t show any more than a sentence now. It took them long enough. Although the post match interview was much , much better. I vote for more Marcelo, please, come on change.org!

I am not keen to give up my satellite subscription even though it is the source of my continued frustration. If I keep the sports package, I get a cheap movie deal for a start. I am not yet SkyQ ing as I’m not bothered with that. 401HD undoubtedly gives you a brilliant view of the game (especially if you are stood behind a pillar for £39 plus £1 bates tax) and it enables you to see shots from several different angles. It is MUCH better than that Irish guy on the EFL show. The fact that I now find Ian Holloway endearing, is testament to how annoying Murray is. Even Liam Rosenior is better than Colin. He is much better than Jimmy Fled for the Money in my Bank though.

As Leeds United will be on Skytvisf**kins**t for another 6 games, before they release what they are going to schedule in December (I wonder who???), it will be interesting to see who else they can scrape from the bottom of the barrel to feature as the guests on our live games. Who will be the next washed up, publicity seeking hasbeen guest to jealously tow the “Leeds will never keep up this tempo” party line? Who will be the next victim of fast forwarding at x30 just so I can see the Bielsa interviews?

The phrase if you can’t beat them, join them, simply cannot apply here. We are stuck with Skytvisf**kings**t for the duration. At least when we get promoted, we will get more of the share of the TV money for our appearances than Shaun Harvey could muster from his mumblings – sorry –  “heavyweight punch for punch calculated brow beating bargaining” to get the best deal possible for the EFL TV package. We should get a decent reflection of what we should be earning given the number of people that watch us on the telly. The advertising revenue and visual worth of our team and our fans is probably more than the lower half of the premier league added together.

What we can do is continue to make our disdain heard on the telly as much as possible. What we can do is turn down any advances by Skytvisf**kings**t to give any interviews or photo opportunities to them which may promote their gospel. What we can do is complain as much as possible at any given opportunity about what we, and I don’t just mean the away travellers who have to rearrange flights, coaches, hotels etc. at such short notice, I mean ALL of us who are short changed by the rescheduling of games by the television gods. They treat us like a bunch of performing monkeys, just to be used to promote their brand.

We are not, We Are Leeds and We Are Proud. They are the fools.