Ladies and gentleman – I give you the fabulous Mike Myers. Plus, if that wasn’t enough to give you the Halloween hee bee gee bees, I am even going to add that amazing intro to John Carpenters’ classic 1978 movie Halloween

but that Silver Shamrock clip from Halloween III Season of The Witch? That’s a step way too far for any child born in the 70s.

In previous seasons, Halloween is about the time where the jitters start. Owners start to get itchy feet and those managers who haven’t had a particularly good start to the season begin to get that horrible creeping sensation on their necks, that maybe something just isn’t right. Of course the tell tale sign is normally when the Chairman does an interview on the telly and claims that the manager has the full backing of the Board. In that, they want to see the back of him! But because of the delay to the start of the season because of bat flu, some might be spared their blushes, at least til Christmas. However, it’s hardly much Saving Grace is it?

This was our own club BB (Before Bielsa), happily not any more. Since the collective stroke of genius that was Radrizzani + Orta + Kinnear +/- ? Christiansen for bringing in some players in which led to Bielsa watching us? (who knows??). Whatever combination of events led to Marcelo Bielsa taking an interest in us, we were lucky. Lucky that he was tempted by what he saw. He must have seen something in us. There must have been something that made him see that we had potential. At 65, he’s hardly a spring chicken is he? But he’s no old warhorse like Warnock either.  In all this time he has been at ER, why hasn’t anyone asked him why he chose us? Or have they and he just hasn’t said or he’s sworn people to secrecy? There’s no doubt at all that he chose to come to us. Yeah, Victor Orta might have put the feelers out, but as the old saying goes, you can take a horse to water, but you can’t make it drink it.

Bielsa is like one of those clever neighbourhood cats. The ones that just turn up because they know they’re gonna get fed and fussed after. The ones that everyone from the post office to the pub knows. Children, adults and the older ones, all see it and give it a pet, and people will feed it but no one actually knows who owns it. It will come and do what it wants to do in your garden, because he knows it pisses you off and he loves it. But he’ll come and wind his way round your legs til you feed him, because he knows you will and if he doesn’t like the food, he’ll go elsewhere. He’ll even have a kip on your chair or ride the bus until his stop, and then he’ll wander off. Like Rudyard Kipling’s Cat That Walked By himself, as those people who stop and ask if he wants a lift to Thorp Arch know, Bielsa Walks By Himself and all places are alike to him (if you didn’t do it in English at school –  read it)

Back to the Horrors of Halloween, it wasn’t so long ago when we were going through managers like it was going out of fashion. Bat flu has extended the lease of life to some of the more fortunate, but there’s no doubt at all, with current standings, courtesy of bookmakers.co.uk, Agent OGS is in the running.

But which Charmed One would take his place? Pochettino? Or would they try to resurrect Fergie? Now that would be a proper horror show. Let’s hope that the Scum Board are so eager not to lose face that they keep Ole Ole for a bit longer.

There’s no doubt at all that not having fans in the ground has made a massive difference, and perhaps that is the key to PL and EFL managerial survival. Maybe that’s why they are keeping us away. If there had been a full crowd at Villa park with 3,000 away fans would 7 had gone in without a car radio being chucked at Martinez? Would Spurs have slotted 6 in Salford before a load of prawn sandwiches had been hurled at Son? Mind you, not having a crowd didn’t help Sir Ferme LaBouche the Forest manager, considering that celebration when they beat us last season, you’d have thought that they got promoted, won the PL, the European Cup and secured InterGalactic Peace in that 90 minutes. I won’t even mention Derby…. Please note, I know his name is Sabri LaMouchi but those of you who know a bit of French, will understand the comparison that I have drawn.

However, even though we haven’t played 6 games yet, the excuse generator has  already been hard at work. I rarely watch any pre match build up on SkyTVisf**kings**t, basically because I cannot stand Jamie CareerScouser’s drawl. It’s like that Cerys from Catatonia, whose accent became even more annoyingly Welsh (sorry Taff!) after she got famous from 1997’s Mulder and Scully. I’ve met a lot of people from Livarpool in my lifetime, and none of them sounded like that. It’s how people who aren’t from Liverpool wind Liverpudlians up by putting on a Scouse accent. Dreadful!

Unfortunately, I had already had my tea on Monday, so I was a captive audience with my cuppa and packet of “perfect for dunking” Foxes Viennese biscuits. I didn’t want to get the remote covered in tea, so I was subjected to Jamie’s whining about how Dick Van Dyke getting injured and Scum and ‘Pool dropping points last week, meant that “all that would be needed was 90+ points this year for the title” and “the bar is being set really low this season”. It’s as if winning the league is a done deal. It’s as if winning the title for the first time in 30 years, with a lot of help from VAR, automatically entitles you to a winning run.  Maybe Jamie and Jimmy know something we don’t?

What I do know is that until we get back into the stadia, the results are going to be skewed. Like all Leeds fans who have the luxury of attending games home and away (I say away hopefully!), the atmosphere that we generate has a massive impact on our players and the opposition team. We ARE the 12th man. We are part of the backline in defence and the extra 5 yards at the front. We are the extra man in the wall and the extra height at the corner. We are the extra last ditch block in the box and the extra man hitting on the break. In the battle between Leeds Fans v Halloween Hee Bee Gee Bees. Leeds fans would win.

Football is nothing without the fans. Roll on November 9th.

Thanks to IMDb for the image

Today is the day Leeds United as we know it came into being 101 years ago. So it is poignant that on the day we celebrate the birthday of our Club, that it is the day I pay tribute to our mate, Mick Punt, as Leeds United is thing that brought us together.

Mick was Leeds through and through. His first game was in 1964 and he watched his beloved Leeds from behind the goal in the Scratching Shed until the Kop opened in 1968 and he moved there and has been there since. Even as he got older, he still preferred to watch his games from behind the goal.

Apart from one match in the Dark Days of the 3 day week during the power strikes back in the 70s. It was the Cup game against Liverpool and Mick’s boss had kindly said that anyone who had a ticket to the game could have time off to go and watch it. Mick climbed the tree at the side of the Peacock to watch the game which was all fine and dandy until the next day. As many people are aware, the Daily Mirror had a back page photo spread of fans who had tried to see the game, and Mick was there in the picture sat in a tree. His Boss wasn’t very happy about that at all, and when he quizzed Mick about it, Mick just said, ” I just told you I was going to watch the game”. Not much got past him.

Mick’s favourite player was Billy Bremner and his favourite game? The 7 – 0 against Southampton.

Mick started travelling with our branch in 2009. Curly Chris introduced us, saying that he knew “3 good lads who just wanted to go watch Leeds”, and that was that. Another reason that he started coming on our coach may have been that trip they had to the play off final against Watford in Cardiff. Steve remembers how on the way back their coach driver got lost and they ended up sat at Cardiff docks. The driver managed to turn the bus round but somehow managed to lose a bit of the back of the coach, and the passengers helpfully got off to retrieve the pieces for him. He also managed to hit the curb going over a roundabout in a journey home reminiscent of the film Speed. When they stopped at the services, they found out that the drivers’ manager had been on the phone and had sacked him halfway back. no wonder they started travelling with us, nothing like that ever happens on our bus!

Mick’s regular travelling partners were Steve Orchard and Paul Scott, and they were nicknamed the “Shaw Survivors” after the branch inadvertently stumbled into “Defend Shaw Day” prior to our FA Cup tie at Oldham Athletic in November 2009. This was one of The Chairman’s poorer pub stop suggestions.  However, considering their first game with the branch was our infamous trip to Crewe (yet again another of The Chairman’s brilliant ideas!) via Sandbach on 21st March 2009, where we found ourselves sharing the town with 250 Boro fans en route to Stoke, it could have been worse. The Rozzers ordered us to stay in one pub, which was duly noted with all due respect as everyone just went for a wander anyway.

Whatever life threw at Mick, and there have been a fair few obstacles, if Mick could physically get to a game, he did. Despite all his health problems, he made the trip to Arsenal in January – and back! He was never any trouble on the bus, and always happy to have a sit and a chat with anyone who wanted to have a beer and set the world and Leeds United to rights.

Mick will be missed by all of us in his extended Leeds United family, but he will be missed the most as a best friend, partner, father and grand father to Sue, Matt, Jo and Ella, Daniel, Isla, Caitlin and Brandon.

RIP mate.

Who would have thought that at the start of the season? 6 points out of 3 games?

I’ll tell you who, NOBODY apart from maybe the bloke who won that £122 million on the Euromilions the other week.

When the fixtures came out, we got dealt Livarpool away as our opening fixture in another continuation of the summer’s Universe of Alternate Roald Dahl, typified by “Tales of the Completely Expected aka Stories of The Blatantly Obvious”.  It was hardly surprising at all that we would find ourselves at the end of 90 minutes plus the necessary injury time required to achieve the “correct” result, 12 inches or at least a misplaced foot (or arm), away from a deserved draw from that game. Enough has been said already about those penalty decisions. In reality, it doesn’t matter what we think, once that final whistle is blown, that’s it, game over …….. unless of course you are Scum, it’s the 100th minute of the game and you were promised 3 points. Harsh? Never.

Our next game against the might of that dedicated follower of fashion, Scott Parker (and his jardigan) and the Capital’s second favourite club, Fulham was another 7 goal thriller in the end. But them, T’Blades and Livarpool for our first 3 games, for me spelled potentially the worse start to the season we could have. It could only have been made even worse if we had got Everton away as well. Our top flight bogey team. Some wise person will dig out the stats but it’s something daft like 11 wins in 52 visits to Goodison in the last century. It’s never been a good hunting ground for us. We last won in 1990, I think.

Why Worry? And I don’t mean the opening track of the Dire Straits album Brothers In Arms. Why? Because barring injuries, Fulham and T’Blades had that lethal combination of players who always score against us. Mitrovic, that McBurnie bloke and Billy ‘Blades 4eva’ Sharp. Whilst Bielsa knows his craft, this isn’t something that Marcelo could beat with just good football. This is jinx, bad hoodoo, bad vibes, witchy craft stuff. You may laugh at my superstition, but how many of you had a panic when you saw Wilder bring on McBurnie and Sharp? Admit it, ALL of you. I saw that subs board go up, saw them lining up on the touchline, and it was squeaky bum time. As for the Fulham game, admittedly we scored some damn fine goals against Livarpool the week before, but when Koch took the hit for another dodgy penalty, the only thing going through my mind was Groundhog Day.

But it’s all behind us now. 6 points out of 3 games. Brilliant. An average of two points per game will see us in Europe. Dare to dream? Yeah, we dare. It’s like standing up and flicking the V’s at the Premier League. Something you see in the movies, triumph over adversity, but we have to be careful. Bielsa needs to tread carefully.

I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again, the old cliche (as opposed to Klich), EVERY game will be a Cup Final in this league. Especially this season, the first season back in 16 years. There’s the usual “Dirty Leeds” nods to battles of old at ER and the odd away (Stamford Bridge – Ken, and I don’t mean the one near York in 1066), but this season there is the Bielsa factor. Since we got promoted, every pundit has said that Bielsa is THE coach of all coaches. The “One”. Mourhino was the “Special” One, Guardiola the “Focused” One, Klopp the “Chosen” One who finally got Liverpool the title after 30 years, Frank the “Fat Cry Baby” One and finally Ole, the 100th minute winner One. For you older readers, I know that at Newcastle at some point, Kevin Keegan, Kenny Dalglish and Alan Shearer were called The One or at least The Messiah, but I can’t seriously think about Steve Bruce without seeing Robin Williams as Mrs Doubtfire, so I’m not going to digress further.

As I said, every pundit has talked up Bielsa as the man that everyone has learnt from. But frankly, up until he joined us in 2018BB (Before Bielsa), I can’t remember them ever saying anything of the like. Can you? When they were talking about Guardiola, they just went on about how well he did at Barca. Pochettino, rarely was he ever mentioned in dispatches saying that Marcelo had taught him everything he knew. I know I am a sceptic and I always see the worse in people, they don’t call me The Anti Altruist for nothing.

SkyTVisf**kings**t / BT / BBC pundits are deliberately placing Bielsa on a massive pedestal, in the hope that if he falls, the crash will be calamitous. They are setting him up to the scale of Christ The Redeemer proportions, desperate for a Pompeii like catastrophe. They want a Leaning Tower of Pisa style toppling, but given that the Leaning Tower has been leaning for the last 840 years and has STILL not fallen over, Lineker is in for a long long wait. I would say that his hair will turn white, but it has already.

The rest of it?

Well, the transfer window is still open as I type. I said after the Liverpool game that Koch just needs time to bed in. There was never any way that he could do a Ben White and just slot straight into the team. Ben White was the Player Of The Season for me last year. Absolutely outstanding. We need to get him back when Brighton give into us after Christmas, and just hope to God that he hasn’t lost any of his fitness in between times. The fact that the season ended and then there was such a short period in between to get everyone training together after all that booze eventually got out of their systems after we got promoted, doesn’t help. They haven’t played properly as a team sufficiently. Then again, 6 points out of 3.

Goals? Patrick is on fire. 3 in 3 games. I can’t help thinking that the good start to this season and pretty good end to last, has been helped by the lack of whingeing from the stands. Like Chris Wood proved in his last full season with us, he can score goals. He just needed the crowd to get off his back. I’ll repeat what I said in a previous blog. If he was tattoed within an inch of his skin, had a ponytail and was knocking off Scarlett Johansen, Margot Robbie and that one off Game Of Thrones all at the same time, you still wouldn’t like him, because he’s a bit posh. Numpties.

thanks to below for the picture of what I will be eating tomorrow before the Citeh game

https://lh3.googleusercontent.com/proxy/6Ebxv5KOb48HCfYL6WqV9ovqiA25U85wkf0mnJtM9kuqc4q0rqJ3ozrjgNhDdkRtkyszRupUMcvOsyyrPtutVCxOrbiXuthCJEuo_lPL-joWVh0kDofbGuUqGg