For those of you who never did O level Latin, viribus unitis means with united forces or with all ones might. Thanks to a bit of opportunistic photography at a half term stadium tour by a certain former Branch Secretary, this is what appears on the changing room walls at Leeds United.

Now you could be forgiven thinking that this has always been there, after all, we are Leeds United, but given it is emblazoned on a poster of our current team ( Wood, O Kane and Ayling), somehow I think not. Coincidentally, it was also the name of Emperor Franz Joseph I’s favourite Dreadnought Class battleship which was commissioned in 1911. Despite spurious attempts to link the Austro-Hungarian ruler to anyone in the current squad or management team, I can only conclude that this is mere coincidence.

So what is the relevance of this?

To me (and as usual PLEASE read The Disclaimer), this sums up where we are and what we are. United. Finally.

Today, pre match in the pub, there was a palpable air of uncertainty. For the first time in ages, it was brought up that we may be getting our 25% return on our season tickets, and it wouldn’t be a bad thing. Come on! Its not even March yet! There are still 12 games to go, that’s a quarter of a season, everything to play for. It’s not as if the teams above us are runaway leaders. As it stands right now, we are 9 points off 2nd place, 3 games basically. The only game this season where I can honestly put my hand on my heart and say that we were outplayed throughout the whole 90 minutes was QPR, the first game of the season. Oh yes, and Sutton, f***ing disgrace, yes I am still very annoyed…… But in the league, QPR,  7 months ago, when Garry with two Rs was just finding his feet, and yes, people were already calling for his head.

Look where we are now. Remember this?

https://www.leedsunited.com/news/team-news/56/2016-17-season-tickets-now-available

After the first few games, this was all people could talk about and the main discussion was how Mr Cellino was planning on getting out of paying this, as there was clearly no way we would ever achieve this and he would probably do a runner and leg it before he had to pay up anyway. There’s no point denying it, you all thought it, and yes, there are probably some who still think it now. Unfortunately if you follow the link, the watermarked poster boys are Lewis Cook and Alex Mowatt…oops!

So back to today. Everywhere you go (not just the Golden Lion pub), you hear how Cellino’s lack of spending in the transfer window has let us down. How we are never going to amount to anything with all these loan players. How we should have got Nugent or Fletcher and jumped at the chance of signing Rhodes. I am sick of hearing how much we need a proper striker and how much the midfield is lacking.

Today the team exemplified the word united. A sterling team effort by all. We do not play attractive football, but today, like we were doing in October and November, the result was ground out. Wood poked in his goal after his first controlling touch from a beautiful Beradi cross and even I couldn’t knock Green’s save from that “penalty”, which realistically was 6 of one and half a dozen of the other. Beradi, who has been playing out of position since Charlie Taylor got injured, has been outstanding. He is clearly a right back, but he has slotted in so well, and unlike Sacko today, clearly can use his right and his left foot equally. O Kane, another unsung hero also put in an excellent shift. As for The Duke, when he has a good game, he does have a good game. I still think Bridcutt is playing too deep and gave the ball away a bit too much for my liking, but where the gaps appeared, someone came in to fill in, and again, Luke Ayling had another class effort in defence and going forward, apart from that poor clearance which he should have left, which led to the corner from which they got the penalty.

Come On Leeds!

ps thanks to former Branch Secretary for the photo

It’s that time of the season again, time to get quizzical, quizzical. Think Olivia Newton John in her leotard, leggings and headband on Eggheads. Actually, on second thoughts, let’s not.

The Annual LUSC quiz is a tradition that goes way back. In the 80s, there used to be inter branch quizzing galore, with many references to quiz teams in pubs far and wide across Yorkshire, mentioned in our branch meeting minutes. Not so many moons ago, I remember going to one at Headingley, where the top teams from LUSC quiz were invited to face the cleverest Leeds Rhinos teams. Our branch fared quite poorly in that one too, but it is the taking part that counts!

Sadly now, there is but one main event and it was hosted in The Eddie Gray Suite, in the (Magnificent New) East Stand last night (Thursday 23rd February 2017). Bizarrely enough, when I normally check in at Elland Road, every individual part comes up on my phone, apart from the Eddie Gray Suite, maybe Google Maps have the hump as well.

So the branch entered 3 teams. The newest entry ( The Grumpy Whites) made up from the wise heads of Dave Rowson, Karen (Abbott) Webb, John Webb and the youngest brain of the night, Garforths very own hot shot, Sean Hunter. The Deputy Yates (Jolly Whites) team of Andy Yates, James Proctor, Callum ( Marseille 2nd biggest city in France) Brook and late arrivee Paul ( Smuff) Smith made their second appearance, and the usual doggedness of Geoff Thrush, Mick Barker and The Secretary and The MPO dared to sit where no one else would – right by the window overlooking the car park! True to form we nearly missed the first question as we were too distracted trying to think of the word for fear of heights. We settled for Vertigo Sufferers as the team name, as none of us could remember acrophobia. It’s a good job that wasn’t one of the questions, as we would have got it wrong! Harrogate Acrophobics saved for next season then, unless of course we get there as early as Deputy Yates did, in which case we will pick the lower seats nearest the food.

The MPO would like to extend thanks to the Leeds United catering service for the fabulous pork pie, peas and mint sauce by the way. Andy (I think) the catering manager said that the pork pies were only put on as an after thought, as their planned offerings were un-named meat and potato and cheese and onion pies. Thank goodness someone had the foresight to source the pork pies. You cannot beat a pork pie, mushy peas, gravy and mint sauce for a pub quiz. Admittedly, never had that combination with a bottle of Valpolicella but it’s Thursday, why not?

Last season Geoff, Mick, The Secretary and The MPO vowed to do some revision to prepare, like we do every season actually. And, like we do every season, we arrived at the quiz still not able to put names to current squad numbers between the 4 of us. Shoddy! Sure enough round 5, squad numbers! And not just this season, but promotion winning seasons too. So, after an excellent first two rounds start, the Harrogate Knights sank further into the mire with every Leeds United question fired at us. I can’t speak for the other two branch teams , but save the question of David Batty’s two shirt numbers, we didn’t do very well. The round was soundly topped off with “what was Harry Kewell’s number?” . We answered 666, correct answers on a postcard please…

The “general sport” round flummoxed us too, our answer to “Who is the England rugby union captain? was an inspired Donald Trump, again, incorrect, but good choice I thought. Luckily enough the combination of The MPO remembering that Beth Jordache buried Trevor under the patio in Brookside and Geoff Thrush recollecting how unfairly Gareth was beaten into second place by Will Young meant that the Harrogate Whites managed a joint 4th spot highest ranking, with the other two in the not too shabby 9th (Grumpy Whites) and 10th (Jolly Whites) places out of a possible 16 ( I’ll check that up and correct as necessary). Had The MPO not over-ruled Geoff over his knowledge of the Metropolitan Line and Mick Barker had insisted more vehemently on his 1980s info, we may have still achieved joint 4th, but at least Mick remembered Richard Naylor put a brace past Yeovil.

Our thanks to the above-mentioned for their attendance and of course to the LUSC for their organisation and Leeds United for their hospitality. Roll on next season, let’s try to start reading up sooner and get those squad numbers in our heads. New branch motto viribus unitis (thank you Dave Rowson for that little nugget) and to finish with Olivia Newton John..

Since Marco Silvestri came to Leeds United, there has only been only been one Love Story that matters. You have to admit it, the camera doesn’t lie, she only has eyes for one person. Since the first time they met, Deputy Yates has been “bumping into” the lovely Sofia far too many times for this to be a casual fling. Either that or Deputy Yates has some serious man marking issues. Hardly!

Luckily enough, the “Managers Curse” that has plagued Brian McDermott, Uwe Rosler and Steve Evans (can’t even remember a picture with Redfearn- must have been his own doing that one), has yet to touch the delicate hands of Sofia.

So here it is in all it’s glory… I think Marco is safe!

Bournemouth in Marco’s shirt, just so she remembers who her Number 1 really is

Blackburn in September over a romantic plastic glass of Carling

Barnsley away smouldering in Andy’s shadow

Huddersfield with a reassuring thumbs up

It wasn’t even an hour into the journey down to Ipswich before The Chairman had come out with some right crackers. I wish I could do service to all of them, sadly, I can’t, so this will have to do.

Peter Skellern sadly passed away last week and I have duly posted a tribute on the branch facebook page under instructions from Charley.  The Chairman stated that he thinks both Peter Skellern and Peter Sarstedt should be made honorary members of Harrogate & District LUSC. Probably Peter Sarstedt more so, given how often Where Do You Go To My Lovely is requested on the coach on the way back from an away game. Given that other societies have taken to adding members who they think would want to belong to their groups, it was decided that this should be discussed at the next branch meeting.

As is the usual in these conversations, The Chairman then decided that other notary figures should also be considered for honorary branch membership, given their specific skill set and any similarities that may or may not resonate with our branch. Napoleon Bonaparte was one suggestion, quickly over-ruled on the grounds that he was French, so Nelson was suggested as a more appropriate choice (not wishing to be short-ist or French-ist of course). It was flagged up that Scandinavians are notorious Leeds fans, so both Hagar The Horrible and Noggin The Nog were also put forward by the Media & Publicity Officer.

Somehow, The Chairman associated all of these conversations with an episode of Basil Brush, where the puppet itself fell off and all you could see the was the two fingers of the puppeteer. I have no idea why the Chairman would associate that image with the branch, but he is The Chairman after all, and what he says goes…

Further investigation into Basil Brush by the MPO has found this little story, which The Chairman has probably never seen before and therefore I have added it, in hope that it gives The Chairman further insight into the character of our potential honorary member.

Please note that the branch does not endorse hate crimes, the selling of lucky heather or pegs and definitely takes exception to the use of hypnotism as a means of inducing favour with the opposite sex.

Noted incitor of hate crime Mr B Brush in his pre Strasbourg Court Of Human Rights days

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-542353/BBC-ban-Basil-Brush-gipsy-sketch-hit-police-probe.html