Deadpool, and I don’t mean the occasionally humorous comic book hero film starring the Wrexham owner. That Deadpool film, which was a far better film than the earlier Mr Reynolds’, Green Lantern was much less entertaining than this one.

This is the last of the great Dirty Harry films from Clint Eastwood. The Deadpool storyline was that our hero, Harry somehow found himself on a list of celebrities which was part of a twisted gambling game to see which one was going to get knocked off next.

Not that I am saying that there is anything like that going on at Leeds United… but watch out Jack Harrison…

Regular readers will know, I am only joking, the ones with the red crosses on them have not been bumped off, some have genuinely left for good reasons (like warming a bench for £150k a week), but they are no longer with the club. The Bielsa Legacy has been systematically dismantled since our new manages arrival. Yes, I know, every manager will want to get their own players in, blah, blah, blah but who is left from the original Bielsa team? Meslier, Coops, Ayling, Dallas (if he ever gets back from injury), Llorente, Koch, Pascal, Bamford (if he ever gets free from injury), Harrison, Forshaw, Rodrigo and Joffy.

Remember this from the Leeds United official website?

How many are left from that team? I know, Pablo got old, Ben White was technically only on loan (and then went for big money to Arsenal). But not many, eh? Shacks, Gotts once touted as the new young guns, Dan James, Tyler all shipped out. Even the youth (u23 and 21s) like Cresswell, Leif Davis and their boss, Mark Tinkler have gone their merry ways.

Anyway, you all know that I am not a big fan of the manager. You all know that the whole “performance was more important than the points” thing really p*ssed me off. You all know how I hated this

So, it hasn’t taken much to rile me of late.

4 wins all season. Chelski and Livarpool, our two 2 “massive wins”. Forest and Brentford obviously took note of our game plan! Or maybe Livarpool and Chelski were missing their yet to be replaced leading lights, Mane and Rudiger? Wolves and Bournemouth are the other two. Massive failure to beat Wolves in the League Cup, despite Wolves being in a worse position than us and playing players with squad of numbers 71 and 88.

But Wednesday night, that took the biscuit.

Many of you had already left at the final whistle. It was midweek and a school night, most of you had work the next day or kids to take home. I don’t begrudge the ones who leave dead on the final whistle. Me, I like to stay for a while. I am glad I did.

At least I got to see Klichy leave the pitch for the final time in Leeds colours. That meant a lot. I was wondering what the heck was going on as it seemed a long final lap. Then I saw something on the big screen but couldn’t quite hear what Pablo was saying. Then I saw the T shirts and the guard of honour, and then the tears.

I had known for some time that Klich was going. He wasn’t getting a start and even though he made a massive impact when he came on, it was clear that our manager was never going to seriously play him. Klichy didn’t get into the Poland squad because he wasn’t getting enough game time. Which was correct. Why would you pick someone to play in the World Cup if they hadn’t actually been regularly playing for their league team? Unless you are Gareth Southgate of course. If Southgate was the Polish national manager it wouldn’t have mattered how much he had played, cos he would have just picked him anyway. Kalv.

So the writing (like the graffiti on the gates at the NE corner) was on the wall for Klichy anyway. He was never going to get picked over the perfect passing, silky skills and tubthumping tackles  of Roca, Aaronson and Adams.

But to not bother telling Leeds fans that this was his last game, even though the guys who printed those T shirts and the ones who put together the video montage knew it was, that was despicable.

Leeds United have done a lot of bad things in the last few years, but this was p*ss poor. Granted not as bad as sacking Bielsa, as that was unforgivable, but this ranks not far behind.

Surely the fans that Leeds United regularly communicate with would have told the people running the Club that Klich’s eventual departure would be something that really mattered to us. The fans that Leeds United engage with MUST have been aware how much Klich meant to all of us. The people that Leeds United talk to MUST have spelt out the disappointment of being deprived of seeing us win the league and the promised open top bus ride with the Championship trophy. The hurt of not giving Pablo and Beradi a decent send off, etc. etc. need I go on?

Leeds United must have known that Klich had a massive place in the hearts of all Leeds fans. Who else has had such a decent song in the last few years? Pablo and Kiko Casilla. Beradi. Pontus, and Klichy. So why weren’t we told? And why did he leave on Weds? The MLS league doesn’t start til later in the year? What was the rush?

Add this to the introduction of season tickets on people’s phones, the removal of the Pavilion facilities for normal match going fans, the push for cashless matchday refreshments and, not forgetting the “new crest”. Remember how they told us that the night we got promoted there would definitely NOT be any presentation of the trophy or any sort of celebration? Even though people had gone down early and seen an open top bus sat there ready for something that we had been assured would not happen? The debacle that is the lack of engagement and dialogue with ordinary matchgoing fans continues.

I was fuming, but where was the rest of the furore?

It petered out with people more concerned about the Gnonto song.

Really? Is that more important than completely ignoring one of our most influential and well liked players? You tell me.

But this was the kick in the bollocks when you are down.

We didn’t deserve this and Klichy deserved more for his loyalty and service to our Club.

But I am in a minority. I have been told that it must be the one in, one out way. We had to get rid of Dan James for Gnonto, didn’t we? So we are sacrificing Klich for another Red Bull player. Most people will be happy with that. Most people will be happy if he replaces the whole team with RB players, if it means we stay up.

Even if it means that the football continues to be beige, people will be happy. Because the league is more important than the Cup.

So when we go to Cardiff, with 6000 plus, and we lose, most Leeds fans will be happy with that. The league is more important.

Me? Wait for the next blog.

Houmous.

But we might win though…

January 3rd. Remember the date…

It seems like such a long time now. In terms of time and in terms of the football we are watching. Apologies for the fuzzy picture – Samsung for you! I think that today’s forecast of  maximum temp of 11 and minimum temp of 10 degrees is a bit misleading. Completely conflicting with the actual temperature outside this morning – which was bloody freezing. Full on windscreen scraping at 6.30am this morning! But it is January after all. Winter. Brrr.

Anyway, back to football

January 3rd 2010. The manager – Simon Grayson. The second to last manager we have had who was interested in a cup run. It’s a shame he didn’t do too well in the play off final though.  Our last manager to engage in cup run was the Mighty Steve Evans, who got us to the heady heights of the 5th round. I liked Steve Evans.

13 years on and where are we now? The gulf that divides Leeds and a decent Cup run has become so huge, it could well be described as a crevasse. Let’s not mince words – Mariana Trench. As is the gulf between the football we are playing and the football we were playing.

The recent years under Bielsa hasn’t helped. Even under him our Cup runs weren’t much to write home about, but his job was to get us promoted, which he did. The football we played the last season in the Championship and the 1st season in the PL was exceptional. The best I have seen us play in a long long time. Some of those games are probably the best games I have watched in real life. Certainly there were lots of heart stopping moments, both home and away, but I suppose beating Birmingham at St Andrews or that home game against West Brom? Probably still cannot beat the display in Monaco in 1995 though. Yeboah. Yeboah.

Either way, after drudgery of losing just 3-1 to Citeh at home ( I know, it could have been worse if Grealish had brought his shooting boots that day) and the stalemate at St James’s Park, the football we are enduring is hardly enough to light a sparkler, let alone a firework.

After watching the Brentford v Livarpool game last night and Chelski’s poor effort against Forest, no wonder we beat them. Our other two wins so far this season, were against Bournemouth and Wolves ( I think it was an own goal in the end?). But at least the teams below us are (up to press) worse than us, so my target of 16th this season is, us safe from relegation.

This is possibly THE most pessimistic I have been in a long long time. But at least I think we are safe from the drop. Purely because there are 6 teams (Bournemouth, Everton, West Ham, Forest, Wolves and Southampton) below us. I think I could maybe chuck in Leicester in the relegation dog fight too, so a bit more of a safety cushion there. Fingers crossed.

Whilst most, if not all other Leeds fans saw a brave defensive performance against Citeh, I’m afraid I just saw an off-the-pace De Bruyne and Grealish minus his shooting boots. Against Newcastle, even though I was a million miles from the pitch, we looked slow and narrow. But according to the manager, we “put in a solid display”. I may just have the January blues, but realistically I see nothing which makes me think we will be anything more than, well, 16th.

The only outstanding moments so far this season have been Meslier’s saves and Pascal’s efforts in front of goal. Meslier has kept us in it several times, and he managed to annoy the Barcodes on Saturday. Always a bonus.

Beige

In food terms, right now Leeds United are houmous. Beige but does the job.

At times under Bielsa, we were medium rare T bone steak, triple cooked chips in beef dripping, with a mountain of onion rings and just half a grilled tomato please. Sometimes we were a mega mix naan kebab with chilli and garlic mayo – exceptional times! But in the main, a decent ribeye steak, chips, onion rings and tomato (no mushrooms).

In the PL at the moment, Arsenal isn’t even rump steak let alone rib eye. Citeh are the equivalent of BBQ meat feast pan pizza hut delivery (sometimes right on time and toppings to the edge, other times 10 minutes late and not enough ham). Livarpool and Sc*m? Drive thru Big Mac Meal. Always full of hope that it will be as good as it looks on the picture, but in the main, limp soggy bread and overdone chips. Newcastle though, they are beginning to look like the roast beef dinner, with a giant Yorkshire pudding of the league this season.

Midtable Spurs, Brentford, Brighton etc. delectations are Drakes fish and chips, Wetherspoons big breakfast, Toby carvery, KFC bargain bucket and maybe the Mill Hill Doner. At the other end of the table, you have Southampton currently on the Asda smartprice veg pasty, with the rest of the bottom half ranging between Greggs vegan sausage roll, Cooplands 4 sausage rolls for £1.20, supermarket quiche and maybe reaching the heady heights of a Fray Bentos steak and kidney pie.

Us? Houmous.

And like all houmous, you could chuck a bit of money at it and go to town for Marks and Sparks / Waitrose / Sainsburys Taste The Difference red pepper stuff, but it’s just houmous. Even if Radrizzani does what the fans want him to do, and he splashes the cash in the transfer window, we’d still just be generic beige with an extra squeeze of lemon juice and a hint of garlic.

But this is good enough for most Leeds fans. Mid table and concentrating on the league season after season. No cup runs, no excitement, just beige.

It’s just not good enough for me. I’ve been spoilt by Bielsa.

But I’ve seen us worse.

Under Warnock we were the yellow stickered egg and cress sarnie in brown bread reduced to 10p. I’ll stay the course, like I always do and hope for better times ahead. If you don’t expect too much, you’re never going to be let down too harshly.

16th.

Until the new Messiah comes. Until then, we will always have the hope of January 3rd. I just hope it doesn’t take us another 13 years.

Happy New Year! This is the January 2023 first post of the year. Unfortunately due to the lack of league football in the last few months there hasn’t been much to update you on, but after the storming draw against Newcastle and the predictable loss against Citeh at home, we are back on track with a vengeance.

Monthly Branch Meeting.

The first monthly branch meeting of the year was held on Sunday 1st January with a smaller than usual turnout. Perhaps the result against the Barcodes the day before was to blame, but just a select group managed the short meeting at the Londesborough before the Christmas decorations were taken down.

LUSC Player of The Month for November was Meslier (who has been player of the season so far for me anyway), votes are due in for Player of The Month for December now.

The final figures from the 40th anniversary do have been collated. After the costs of the entertainment etc. have been subtracted, Dep Andy Yates confirmed that £150 has been donated to St Michaels Hospice. A bag of Leeds United / LUSC goodies were also gratefully received at the Hospice shop before Christmas.

Away Games

Despite initially announcing we would not be running a bus to Cardiff, we have now conceded and the bus to Cardiff on Sunday 8th is now nearly full and tickets are still on sale at Elland Road. I think Cardiff are giving us the whole end plus a bit more according to the Leeds United website. I never thought that I would see the day when we would not sell out an away allocation, given our rise into the upper echelons of the PL. I thought the days of being able to pay on the gate at Villa away because no one wanted to go to a midweek away fixture were a thing of the past. However, I think this is more of a combination of post Christmas skintness (including massive gas and leccy bills) and the apathy of Cardiff fans. After all, who wants to go watch two teams who have no interest in progressing into the next round? If someone were to ask me who has the least interest in going through to the 4th round, I would say we are on an equal par, but Cardiff are desperate to stay in the Championship, so I am guessing we will win. Woo hoo.

If anyone has any feedback on away games re stewarding / facilities etc. we are still doing reports for every away game, so please feel free to email any comments (good or bad) after aways so we can keep the Club / police informed.

There are still a few places for Villa away on Friday 13th January, get in touch if you want any travel.

We will aim to continue to try to keep the travel costs as low as possible to help people out as much as we can in the current climate.

A.O.B

There may be an event in early February, please keep a lookout for any details.

We are still doing mailouts and facebook posts simultaneously re aways etc. for those who aren’t on the facebook closed group. If anyone has joined the branch and isn’t receiving these, please can you let us know as soon as possible and we will try to add you to the group. Please note, we are NOT accepting friend requests on facebook for the foreseeable future due to the hacking etc. but we will add you to the closed group when you join up to the branch so you have access to the departure details etc.

Congratulations to the lucky winners of the raffle prizes at the 40th do. I will try to post the pictures up at some point in the gallery. We are having technical issues at the moment.

There will probably not be a monthly branch meeting in February, as we are playing most Sundays. In the event that something important comes up, we will have an informal catch up, otherwise please keep your eyes peeled for any updates on the mail out / closed group.

Well folks, it’s Cup football week and sadly, it’s the same old, same old AGAIN.

You may be asking why I would think anything different would happen this season. After all we’ve got a gruelling run up til Christmas of non stop long aways and we’re down at the bottom of the table, lower than our opponents, Wolves, so why would it be any different from any other season? We need to concentrate on the league surely, because we have had so many injuries at the start of the season and our players are exhausted after the intensity of the summer’s international tournaments. Right?

What’s that?

We don’t have an imminent terrible run of long aways? No one told me that after Spurs there was going to be a 6 week break for most of the team because of some tournament? Really? 6 weeks more or less of no games? Has anyone told Leeds United about this?

But surely our opposition on Wednesday were better than us and we wouldn’t stick a chance?

What???

Are Wolves below us in the league? Wolves don’t even have a proper manager? That one has passed me by. Nah, that can’t be right. Wolves have got a worse record than us since the start of the season? Eh? But haven’t we had a horribly depleted team full of injuries because Murderball and Bielsa is too much for them? Bielsa got sacked in February?

WHAAAT?

On paper we should have won that game on Wednesday. The Wolves fans were thinking that they were going to have their arses well and truly  whopped before the game.

What did we do?

We lost.

But “nevermind guys, it was a good performance, and we were really unlucky”. “They were a far more experienced team. The young guys played really well”. I think Ayling, Harrison and Klich might have had some experience getting us promoted to the PL, or did Take Me Home get that wrong? Mind you – they were playing in their right positions for most of that time.

These are the line ups

And these were the subs. Pay extra attention to the two Wolves subs who got played, shirt numbers 77 and 81

Vastly more experienced team? You are having a giraffe.

This was the subs bench at the Citeh v Chelski game

Do you notice anything different?

I admit, they have bigger squads, but how many of those players will be representing their country in the Slavery World Cup too and have been having that extra pressure on them? Citeh have Brentford and Chelski have the newly resurgent Bar Codes tomorrow. But they still put out a decent bench and Conti played Kane, even though he’s had his work cut out since Son has been injured.

In summary, we had an unusually winnable game at Wolves on Wednesday.

Unusually, there were plenty of tickets for the game on Weds, because it wasn’t a massive “glamour tie”, so parents and kids hoping to see their heroes, were able to get tickets. Judging by the number of unfamiliar faces I saw on Weds, there were quite a few there who had been lucky enough to get a ticket, that don’t normally go away.

Unusually, the game came on the back of a bit of a good run. Despite people on the day of the Liverpool game actually saying they wanted Dyche, after our win, it was all BRILLIIIANT again. Even though Liverpool were less than ordinary and are still suffering from the departure of Mane to the Bundesliga.

Even betterer, we then go on to beat Bournemouth, after overturning a 3-1 deficit, with …. wait for it ….. substitutions which changed the starting formation! A novel idea if I ever saw one. How refreshing it was to see a corner being taken without two grown men whispering to each other like characters in a Jane Austen book. Honestly, sometimes I think all it would take would be a couple of ribboned bonnets and corsets, Colin Firth to come striding out of the North East Corner in his undies, topped off with Emma Thompson overacting, and it could be Pride & Prejudice or set piece Sense and Sensibility. Oooh Mr Darcy!

So SkinnyJeans has been catapulted, as they say in the USA, from zero to hero. The inspired subs of Willy “he’s not ready for the PL until at least January” Gnonto and Greenwood have propelled us to a massive 12th. 15 points already and only another 24 points needed to secure us PL safety ( I hope). Over a third of the way there, and it’s not even Christmas – with a game in hand.

With Wolves and Forest thankfully having a truly terrible start, we are sitting pretty on top of the 6 remaining relegation fodder teams, PLUS we have that game in hand. So what was wrong with at least trying to get a couple of cup games in, and maybe get a decent home draw to make some money in before Christmas? A full house a ER in the run up to Christmas would have got Leeds some money in from all the kids wanting extra tat in for Christmas. They could have sold a load more of those mass manufactured Xmas jumpers made in the sweatshops in the Far East, and probably raked in a bit more in food and drink to boot. Maybe add a few more £75 memberships and a few more onto that season ticket wait list. £££s or should it be $$$?

What’s wrong with gaining a bit of winning momentum? Three wins in three?

But he just couldn’t do it though. And the keyboard warriors all just went along with the narrative of “let’s stay focused on the league”. 

What have our miserable failings due to fielding weakened sides done for us in the last 20 years? I can forgive Bielsa to an extent because his job was to get us promoted. Apart from the last season where the Board probably were wanting him to get dumped out of the domestic cups sooner, to give them an excuse to give him the boot quicker.

What have our early exits achieved in the last two decades?

Jack all. Apart from managing to piss off every fan who dragged their sorry arses (when they could get tickets because the ground-hoppers were desperate to tick a box) to the likes of Histon, Sutton, Newport etc. 

“First it was the League Cup and before so very long”

Well at this rate, it will be another 50 years before we get to Wembley in a Cup final. Realistically, how else would we get into Europe again? We can’t match the moneymen in the Top 6 for a Chumpions League spot. A win in the Cup could get us to playing Sc*m in the heady heights of the Europa League Final. If we could be bothered that is. This season we could have done a bit more, but same old, same old.

What is wrong with a bit of aspiration? What is wrong with a bit of pride in yourself and passion for the game?

Where would the world be without people who dare to be different, break away from the shackles of normality and put their heads above the parapet? You’d like to think that there are parents and teachers out there who inspire and encourage the young to better themselves. When I was little, it was drilled into me to not just accept stuff without question because I was told to do it. That to simply follow the crowd and accept what was going on wasn’t good if it felt was wrong. I was taught to fight for my beliefs and challenge those who would try and convince me otherwise.

Not to be though, and the keyboard warriors just toed the line and defended everything. And when they couldn’t defend it anymore, they just started with the name calling and insults.

If there is anything that annoys me, it is those Entitled super-fans who feel that they are “more Leeds” than others. No one is any better than anyone else. We are all just Leeds. In some people’s heads though, some are more Leeds than others. 

These are the ones who without any thought or consideration like to chuck insults around to anyone who dares to disagree with them. They have no accountability for their actions or comments, and are just as likely to be screaming for the managers / boards (delete as appropriate) heads one week and then claiming them to be the best thing since sliced bread the next. There’s nothing wrong with changing your mind, but no doubt the ones for example who were sending death threats to players a few seasons back and claiming that none of them were fit to wear the shirt, were all at ER at the open top bus thing celebrating along with Amazon when we got promoted. Similarly the ones wanting SkinnyJ out before Liverpool, probably posted that hugging heart emoji on the video of his post match interview pledging their undying allegiance to him.

Some idiot was laughing at people who went to the game (stupidly) thinking we would win. This fool clearly has no idea that there is a cost of living crisis going on, where every penny counts. And clearly has no empathy for any poor parents who have forked out hard earned money to take their kid to watch their heroes play football. Only to see that disappear in a cloud of complacency and apathy. It is still difficult to get time off work, it is still difficult to get an away ticket. Unless of course, you have the luxury of having enough money to do whatever you want. But you’d think if you did have all that, you’d be a little bit mindful of people less fortunate.

The only thing that riles me more than these imbeciles, are the ones who deliberately stand in your seat at away games and refuse to move on when asked. The ones who “are Leeds United and we’ll stand where we want”. Pushing old people and kids around so they can stand with their mates on their big day out until we start losing. Then they skulk off down to the bogs to do whatever it is that they do in there. The ones with complete disregard for anyone else who actually just wants to watch the game. Because they think that everyone should be like them or they ” aren’t proper Leeds fans”. Even though some of us have been going to games before these were managing to get through the night without wetting the bed. 

We turn up. We watch the game. We celebrate if we win and moan when we lose. It is just how it always is. We pay our money, we have a right to disagree. No need to take the p*ss out of people who just want to see us win, because ultimately, surely that’s what we all want, isn’t it?

Here’s to a FA Cup run in January. Fingers crossed. Unless it is the same old, same old

 

After the weekend, I had no choice but to write this. Because unless you weren’t at the game and couldn’t hear the South Stand, or haven’t seen the video already (which I am not going to share – cos it’s a bit sensitive), it was life imitating art (sort of). I wrote this (see below excerpt) in the last blog, and there it was on Saturday. We start scoring more than two goals in the game and someone starts a song off about Willy Gnonto

I had to laugh, because this may well be the new song for the rest of the season. That is of course, if someone doesn’t report it for being offensive and un-pc, leading to it being cancelled. And rather than it being a small section of the crowd, most heard it and joined in with it (apart from the Offended). And the supposition that Gnonto drinks moretti, eats spaghetti and …. I just can’t write it … was shared over social media. I think we have the Gen Z Enoch Showumni!

Praise to the South Stand from me is rare, mostly because you know my opinion of the “limbs” thing. But whether or not the instigators of the song had actually read my last blog, or whether they just have the same bizarre culturally misappropriative mindset that I have, it was too much of a coincidence. It was life imitating art. Should you find that sort of thing funny – it was funny.

However, if he stops scoring (unlikely) or if the higher powers that be decide that it pushes the boundaries a little too much (more likely) – that may well be the last time we hear that song. But well done. A sturdy pat on the back to you – whoever you are.

The song, like parts of the second half, harked back to some semblance of the days of football past, when we played proper football. I’m not saying that Gnonto and Summerville are the finished article, far from it. Anyone who has spoken to me recently knows how much I think there are bits of Yeboah about Gnonto already. No, I am referring to when we used to be able to pass a ball to one another, in fact string a few decent passes together.

It took the despair away from the mighty mess which was the 1st half at least. I know I have moaned about Leeds fans being fickle, but it was a challenge, even for me, to see any positive in the first 45 minutes. We were dire.

Like we have seen many, many times before we were ridiculously narrow, no wide options to pass the ball to going forward and our midfield, again, were none existent when they hit us on the break. We gifted the equaliser and the second goal, well, no comment. A fair few missed the stroll up the park which was the 3rd goal, as they were too busy enjoying themselves in the bar. Thankfully Greenwood coming on made a massive difference. The rest is history as they say.

We won, and after beating the Scousers and smashing Dick Van Dijk’s defensive record, it seems all is forgiven and we are, once again, heading for a place in Europe.

The master-plan is back on track and everyone who was hoping for Dyche before the Liverpool game, has now been convinced that SkinnyJeans is our next big hope again for Premiership glory. This is all good news for the board, and of course, SkinnyJ. He has got his reprieve, and despite the pre Liverpool panic and doom, it is all back to the rose garden. Everyone is smiley, smiley again.

Unfortunately for Harrison, the disassembling and dismantlement of the Bielsa Boys legacy is also back on track. If only Rodrigo would just stop scoring, that would be the next step complete for the transformation. He remains our top goal scorer, so no chance of that anytime soon.

Whilst Gnonto and Summerville ascending is ultimately brilliant for the club, it spells the end for Harrison and Rodrigo. Harrison will go to Newcastle, where Howe will play him as a proper winger. With a proper defence behind him and a target man and a number 10 at Newcastle, Harrison will do well. He may not be as young as Willy and Crysencio, but he has a good footballing head and when he plays in his correct position, as in the Bielsa team, he will be an asset.

Rodrigo is a brilliant player, but he is not a fans favourite. He will hit as many wayward crosses and miss as many shots as the Aaronson / Adams / Rasmus combination will, but Rodrigo will be slated for them, unlike the others. He will be subbed, even when he doesn’t need to be, when others won’t.

Whilst everyone will complain that he is rubbish and the defence is crap, it will continue to deflect from the truth that midfield is our weakest link. Even though Struijk isn’t a left back, he has done a cracking job. Even though our backline has supplied the large majority of our crosses, and even Coops has scored a goal, they are still at fault for our losses. The fact that they are encouraged to go so far forward, therefore resulting in them having to leg it back when we get hit on the break, escapes the attention of most. We have no defensive midfielders. No Phillips, no Batty-esque players, so why are people surprised that we hand goals to the opposition on a plate?

But this is how we play now, and it has worked because we beat Liverpool and Chelsea and Bournemouth. Hasn’t it? Who cares about our defensive line, because we are winning. Correct? Who needs a team with one touch passing and creative midfielders? Who needs a solid back four? Like Bonnie Tyler – we just need a hero.

Unfortunately this means that we will be watching sport how sport in the movies is played. This is when the hero gets the ball and heads towards goal with “Chariots of Fire” being played in the background. The scorer has to the goal in sight, his team mates around him throwing themselves at the opponents to stop them getting to him, and finally after the epic run, he shoots – he scores. Everyone runs to the hero. Glory Glory Hallelujah! Limbs all round.

It is formulaic and it fits the narrative.

Give me Lee Chapman any day of the week.