The trip to Hull was full of reminiscence due to the presence of an old branch member Mr Reynard, seated far too near to The Chairman for comfort. This sparked various memories from trips of old, with the Vesta meal discussion making it’s second appearance.
For your own information, seeing as The Chairman’s audience has been waiting for his verdict…. yes the Vesta Paella was just as tasty as it was 30 years ago. Obviously, it isn’t paella from 30 years ago, as that would probably (like Kiko’s verdict) taste quite awful by now, but as a bonus, it may have sprouted it’s own strain of vacuum packed super penicillin antibiotic.
I digress, the verdict is in, and the modern day equivalent of Vesta paella- tastes as good as it did way back when The Chairman was much, much younger and hadn’t even heard of Just For Men. He will be having his Vesta Chow Mein soon.
Running Away In Rome
The Chairman: Remember that time when I thought we were being chased by that mob with knives and we all ran out and left Stella in the bar?
Q: There wasn’t actually a mob though, was there?
The Chairman: No, but I thought there was and I just ran out
Q: Had you been drinking?
The Chairman: We were buying bottles of wine for 40p
Q: It was possibly something else?
The Chairman: But I honestly thought there was a mob after us, I had to escape
Q: Had you been drinking all day?
The Chairman: I thought we were going to get stabbed, but when we realised we left Stella in the bar, we sent you back in for him
A: Really brave
The Chairman: It was the big escape from Rome
The Banterzone
The Chairman: This is the “Banterzone”
Q: Eh?
The Chairman: The Banterzone, where anything goes. We talk about everything here. This is where it’s at. These seats, the Banterzone
Q: Like what?
The Chairman: Anything. Anything goes. It’s the official Banterzone.
You know when you’ve made it
The Chairman: Remember when we were young, on a night, you used to go out to a club and order food in a basket.
Q: Food in a basket?
The Chairman: Chicken in a basket. You knew when you made it when you ordered chicken in a basket. Everybody would see you and think “yes, he’s made it, he’s ordering food in a basket”
Q: Eh?
The Chairman: Everything in a basket, even soup in a basket. Yes, nights at the Gallop Inn and chicken in a basket.
Q: You never had soup in a basket then
The Chairman: Didn’t need to, you know you’ve already made it already with chicken in a basket
Lucky Shoes
The Chairman: These are lucky shoes
Q: Eh?
The Chairman: These shoes. Very lucky. We haven’t lost in these shoes. 100% record
Q: Did you get them from the Lucky Shoe Shop?
The Chairman: I got them from Sports Direct
Q: Does that make them lucky?
The Chairman: They’ve been very lucky. I got them from Sports Direct £20. Very lucky shoes
……… Somewhere there is a clown with very cold feet… alternatively: