It began in February 2022, or at least that was the starting point of our story. It could be said that perhaps the ideas were set in motion sooner, but for us, it began in Feb 2022.

I’ll start the story with the classic Star Wars rip off…

A long time ago, in a League far, far away…

It began with Leeds United, a footballing side with lots of history but in recent times, had fallen on hard times. Owners, managers, skint Arabs, liquidations, you name it , Leeds had done it. The scale of the tumultuous fall from Grace, was forever known as “Doing A  Leeds”.

Then a little known manager arrived on the banks of the River Aire from, of all places, Argentina. Not the massive footballing nation of the U S of A, from the smaller, less significant continent of South America.

The football was different and  like a breath of fresh air, Leeds United  breathed life into a stagnant EPL. Soon, both players and pundits, managers and fans and the all important True Gods of Football, became transfixed in what later came known as Bielsaball. Leeds United once again, rose from the devastation of 17 long years away from Top Flight football, and were reborn.

But, despite the awakening of the Forgotten Giant with fancy footwork and quality football, it was just not good enough to increase the Global brand of the “magnificient new” Leeds United. The football on the pitch was good, but it’s global presence was still in it’s infancy. The potential was there, but it was hampered by it’s marketability.

The new American investment in Leeds United, by the 49ers, was part of a second attempt at a USA foray into the EPL. This time, it’s mission was to build back better. After the last couple of minor incursions by the Glazers of Man Utd and the Hicks and Gillet double act at Livarpool hadn’t really scored them many points, The Americans dabbling in the English football game had to get better. When the Henry dynasty of FSG, along with Lebron James, managed to finally get a better footing on Merseyside, with the help of Gurning Klopp, Uncle Sam’s foot was firmly wedge in the door.

With the Kroenke family at Arsenal, the Edens at Villa, Clearlake at Chelski, the two part owners at Fulham and Palace and lastly the guy who bought Bournemouth, there were now 9 PL clubs owned / part owned by USA groups or sporting partnerships. Cue the Welsh assault, by the albeit Canadian born, but now dual registered, Ryan Reynolds and lo and behold, in Feb 2022, the English football league was well within the bounds of the “Special Relationship”.

Back to Leeds United in February 2022.

The global brand seriously needed a kick start at this club. Luckily, despite having a decent first season in the PL, Leeds United were mightily suffering with injuries, and a change of manager could be the catalyst for change. Bielsa had good footballing knowledge on the pitch, but knew very little about the corporate side of things, off the pitch. He didn’t like doing interviews, and the only social media presence was just of him with fans taking selfies. He didn’t really like the players to be distracted by off field activities, so promotion of the “Global brand” was not his forte.

Perfect. Dispose of Bielsa and install someone who really knew how to market the brand. The Bielsa audience was dull. Realistically, he could only engage with the South American continent. Hardly a massive football history there then! Inconsequential, as there would be no market there to engage with. Saturation point was selfishly with their own teams, River plate – what sort of a name is that?

In February 2022, Leeds United were in midtable with 12 games to go. With all their injured players imminently due to return, and with a reasonably easy run in to the end of the season, European football was easily within their grasp. The ideal time to bring in a Champions League manager to guide them into European Glory? Cue the contenders from the Champions League managers list. Javi Munoz from Lincoln Imps FC? David Healy from Linfield FC? Stephen Bradley at Shamrock Rovers. The guy from Rangers FC? Jaissle from Salzburg?

How incredibly lucky that Jessie wanted out of RB Leipzig. And how lucky for Leipzig he did as they are 4th in the Bundesliga at Feb 2023. He was a much better fit and happy in front of the camera, with soundbytes a plenty. Plus the players all loved him at Leeds, who could forget his quote:

Nobody would care that Bielsa was unceremoniously ditched, because the rumours about him losing the dressing room were rife, and plenty of senior players were complaining about him already. The last game of the season came and went, with a thrilling end with Leeds United avoiding relegation and it made great TV on the day. Yes, Phillips and Raphinha were obviously never going to play in a Leeds shirt again, but the money they brought in meant a bumper BIG money signing session was imminent.

The dissenting Bielsa lovers would be shouted down by the fans who got the big money signings that they craved in the summer. The added bonus was that the Bielsa legacy players would be replaced by American players. Cementing further the influence of Stars and Stripes Soccer in the English game.

The start of the 2022-23 season was as good as it could have been, with results against Wolves and Chelsea ensuring that American Boi was sung from the stands. The American dream was complete. The next bonus was the success of the USMNT – cowabunga!

(no, not them!) in the Slavery world Cup.

The USMNT fared considerably better than the silenced German team and most of the other big National sides like Belgium and Uruguay.

The plan that started Feb 2022, was making headway and everything was going to plan. The global brand of Leeds United was growing and more and more high profile Americans were making their way across the pond.

The success of the USMNT ensured that promotion of Stars and Stripes Soccer was kept relevant, and with the return of the likes of Pusilic and the Leeds United midfield mastery, there was no fear that the American dream would be fading.

February 2022, was the beginning.

Now, in February 2032, it is all going swell.

The influence of our American owners and managers have meant that all that relegation rubbish that used to happen in the old EPL disappeared by 2027. We never understood the need for all that promotion and relegation business. There wasn’t the need for it in NFL, NBA, MLS and MLB. As we proved, if we didn’t have a need for it in the US, why did anywhere else need it?

And we established the ESL by 2025 easily. All the other big clubs in Europe were more than happy to just play each other all the time and not bother with home country Cup competitions. The Copa Del Rey and FA Cup in England were small fry and not necessary for our global success. Who needs the likes of Brentford, Nottingham and Sheffield.

Barca and Real were in it from Day One and these legacy fans of the “old leagues” were quickly removed from the scene by digital ticketing and dynamic pricing. Pricing out these match attending fans was easy, they were never necessary once we got the stadiums all rebuilt by the guys that did so well in Qatar. The acoustics in them meant that the sound could be artificially generated so it sounder great on TV. The TV money was the plentiful with everyone made to pay per view each game using the special ESL World Wide Channel.

The money from corporate packages alone at the start of the ESL made billions, and the smaller clubs were easily pushed out by the larger franchises. The national leagues in Europe have been whittled down to 10 teams per Red Bull League in each of the Eastern and Western conferences. Luckily all the EPL franchises in the UK are now based in London, which makes it easier to travel to and from the games in the 3 games per week corporate packages.

By 2027, the World League was formed with the Galaxy and DC United being the inaugural members of the League. And with all the major franchises agreeing to play on the the countries capital cities, London, Paris, Madrid, Munich etc. the travelling carbon offsets are easily manipulated to ensure our zero carbon footprint is maintained.

The fans just all watch in the fan parks now, where we can charge them overpriced food and drink, on top of their ticket price. We control every match attending fan ensuring that only the “right” fans get into these games.

Leeds United? Now Red Bull United. It amalgamated with Manchester United in 2025 and with all their London based followers, it seemed the best thing to do was franchise the Manchester United, Leeds United and West Ham United teams together. They play at the London United stadium now.

And to think, it all began in February 2022

There’s many of you who have no idea where the phrase, “Dad, I fink I got it wrong again” comes from. The picture above comes from 70s time machine, and is of the late, great Dick Emery in one of his many guises, this time of Gaylord, the Bovver Boy. Yes – that was his name and yes Bovver Boys were, well, Bovver Boys. Bad lads +/- knuckledusters.

https://www.facebook.com/sixties.timemachine/posts/dad-i-fink-i-got-it-wrong-again/2177418865645743/

Ah, the 70s, those were the days. When hardly anyone ever took offence to anything that was said in jest, especially things that were said on the telly or in magazines. When there were more important things in life to worry about. Like having a job and earning a wage.

If you think inflation is bad now, just imagine how bad it was in the 70s, when it got to 20%+ at one point. Mind you, not everyone had a telly, let alone 3 tellys, 2 laptops and 5 mobile devices in the house. So you weren’t reminded how bad it actually was 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.

There were 3 day weeks, power cuts, miners strikes and a proper winter of discontent. We had freezing winters – also known as winter weather, and boiling hot summers – also known as summer weather. At school, we were taught that it was the dawn of the New Ice Age too. So there! Science eh?

We had the Troubles in NI, Mrs Thatch, unemployment and the threat of bombs, spies with  poisoned umbrellas and nuclear war hanging over us from behind the Iron Curtain. But we also had flares, Mr Benn, the Clangers and Bob Marley.

The 70s, when football was still the working class game and hooliganism was in it’s infancy. The 70’s, when we needed that two hours of escapism from real life, because real life was frankly, quite depressing. Football was two hours of just being normal, with normal people. Two hours of everyone around you being on an equal par with you. Rich or poor. You were just a football fan, that was it.

Racism? Well, if you were going to football in those days, you will have been well aware of the 90 minutes of racism, sexism and Sectarianism and all the other -isms which were rife on the terraces in those days. The PC crowd that are having the vapours now, would be spontaneously combusting within seconds, if they ever went to a game then. Football was a route of release of anger and frustration of the world as it was. But most of it was said on the terraces, and stayed on the terraces. That was, unless of course, people did carry it in the organised marches etc. There was a lot disaffected youth in those days. There are always bad apples in any barrel.

As racist, fascist, sexist and Sectarianist (yeah – probably not a word, Mrs Barrett my old English teacher would be appalled) people were in those days, at least people didn’t go around burning books written by children’s authors and publicly encouraging violence and death threats. At least Mrs Thatch, Lawson and their MPs weren’t photographed at public demos, in front of signs inciting hatred and decapitation of a group of people whose beliefs have been reduced to a mere derogatory  abbreviation. At least in the 70s people were allowed to live and let live on the whole.

It says it all about today’s society when people can throw paint on works of art or sit on the road for hours with the rozzers bringing them cups of tea, even though they are causing a nuisance, but football fans can be Section 14ed within seconds of arrival outside a stadium. The same society and media channels which stood by, watched and filmed flag burning on Cenotaphs and peaceful looting, are quite happy to see football fans coralled and treated like second class citizens, purely because they are following their football team. 

I digress, sorry, back to football.

“Dad, I fink I got it wrong again” was one of those stereotypical, comedic character assassination catchphrases on the telly at the time. 70’s observation comedians just accepted that some people in life just couldn’t get things right. Some people just said the wrong thing or did the wrong thing all the time. Some people misread the situation, or just simply had no clue that they were doing anything wrong, at all.

It wasn’t just Dick Emery, take the Michael Crawford character Frank Spencer. “Ooh Betty”, he used to say.

Hapless and blissfully happy in his lack of understanding. A life of  innocent ignorance of what was blindingly obvious, to everyone else. My – that’s a fine jumper and shirt combo. I think I have seen that before!

I fink I got it wrong again?

Hands up if you know what I am going to say next. 

How long is this going to carry on? How long are we going to continue sleepwalking with this grand plan? Are we really going to be one of those PL teams consigned to relegation fodder season after season?

I had a bit of a disagreement post match, after the thrilling 0-0 on Sunday against Brentford. A Brentford side, that Brentford fans freely admitted, were only there to not lose the game. A side that were happy to time waste, dive and cheat,and basically go through the motions for 90 minutes just to avoid losing. Shades of Villa? It’s awful to think that we have become THAT side. A side that teams will visit, knowing that an adequate draw will be ready and waiting. Have WE and Elland Road become that 1 pointer? Dear oh dear. 4 wins all season? The table doesn’t lie.

How has it come to this?

Since Bielsa left, the Club have basically done what the fans (some fans – not me) have wanted. The fans who once we got promoted, just expected us to be immediately challenging for Europe and spending like Everton – cos that’s worked out well, hasn’t it?  Nevermind this develop and play the youth nonsense, the fans deserve better than the Youth team.

So, the Club have done what the fans want, and finally spent BIG. They’ve given in and splashed the cash for SkinnyJ and let him buy all his former players up. It’s not even the end of January, and we have EVEN more time to buy more players in. There’s probably more coming in as I type this up. I won’t know any of them, but the Superfans will. They’ll all undoubtedly have masses of Champions league experience and be fit as a fiddle, ready to start on Saturday against the Mighty Accrington Stanley.

Accrington Stanley? Who are they?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pieK7b4KLL4

Remember that one? Classic.

My heated discussion? I dared to say that we were probably playing better joined up, team football under Warnock.

Warnock, with his team of skill lacking hasbeens and mercenaries bought with miniscule funds from the the tiny B*tes “warchest” were playing better than we have been playing so far. After all, football is a team sport. It isn’t just all about one (or three) player (s), is it? Under Warnock we had a poor side, Steve Morison, Michael Tonge, Michael Brown, Stephen Warnock, and Diouf. It genuinely hurts to say these names again. But we had a side that tried their level best, and played and partied as a team – with Paddy Kenny.

At the moment we just don’t play like a team. There is no cohesion, apart from that imaginary piece of string that keeps us all tied together, so narrow all the time. At times, it reminds me of that term, “trying to push square pegs into round holes”. It’s like watching a toddler smashing that square chunk into the triangle hole, without thinking about looking first to see where the triangle hole is. It is painful. Very painful.

We have an embarrassment of talent in that team – or “group” as SkinnyJ calls them. Seriously, what is wrong with calling them the TEAM? Yes, Bielsa bought Raphinha and Dan James, but since he left, I think we have spent more money than Top 5 in the table, Champions League / Cup semifinalists, Newcastle. They only bought a couple of new players in. We’ve bought 5 or 6 now at least. It could be more, I have lost count.

The last guy cost £30 million? And, as a bonus, most of them are fit! Even Lord Bamford is getting there after he injured himself scoring against Brentford last season. This time last year, most of the team were still out to injury and we hadn’t fielded a full strength side since the season before.

So with all this talent, internationals, Champions League veterans, blah, blah, blah, how come we can’t string 3 passes together and have a decent holding midfield? How is it that Pascal is still playing out of position and him and Ayling / Rasmus are having to put the majority of crosses in? Why is it that our defence are so far forward when we are attacking, that they get caught on the break, time and time again, when we fail to score? We are so vulnerable to the counter attack after our set pieces fail to come to fruition. The defence leave poor Meslier abandoned like an unwanted kitten so often, it’s a wonder that he doesn’t think of giving up on his Lynx Africa.

Why are we STILL so narrow? Everyone blames the defence, or Rodrigo. But our problem lies  not solely at the feet of Coops, Koch, Llorente and Struijck or indeed, up front. It is the inbetweeners who are guarding the centre circle that need a stern talking to. 

Pascal has stepped up all season playing out of position. He was made Captain at Cardiff. Why? Was there really no one else? The pressure on him must have been immense at such a young age. The constant criticism of him, even though he is out of position, as part of our back four, must now be affecting him. His confidence must be shot. Yet, he goes forward constantly, given the chance and is our main attacking force at corners.

Poor Rodrigo is playing up front on his own, but more often than not has to retrieve the ball for himself. Then when he gets free and runs towards the goal, he finds himself with no target man for the final ball. And don’t even talk to me about “seconds” and following the ball into the net.

Frankly, had that guy Bamba Dieng agreed to come here from Marseille, or Cody Gakpo from PSV, or even that Wolves player Hwan Hee Chan, in September, where would we be?

Without Willy Gnonto, that’s where we would be.

Realistically, we only got the Moretti swilling, spaghetti munching winger because we didn’t get any of the others in September. Thank goodness for Victor “making do” with this relatively unknown Italian international, who in SkinnyJ’s own words, wasn’t ready to play in the PL til at least January. If any of you are still in denial, go back to the transfer news from September yourselves and look at our headline targets. I fink I got it wrong again? 

But Willy certainly has spared the blushes of SkinnyJ.

Without Gnonto, we probably wouldn’t be in the 4th round of the Cup and we would probably be 2 points off relegation. Oh wait, we are a point off relegation. But we are 15th! 3 points off 13th and with a better goal difference than Forest. Forest, look how much they’ve spent.

But we are at least in the 4th round after Sonny Perkins bagged the equaliser against a Cardiff side that hadn’t won a game since November and were down to 10 men. One of their players hadn’t kicked a competitive ball in 2 months I think. But we managed to get a result and force a replay, which we easily won in a fantastic 5-2 do or die display at home against managerless Cardiff. Willy and Lord Bamford showing us what we can do when we get into space, use our wingers and more importantly, play Harrison in his rightful position. For however long he stays at The Club, that is.

After all, we are spending money like it’s going out of fashion, a la Viv Nicholson, and you mustn’t go to bed just yet… Especially if you are Joffy, Harrison or any of the old Bielsa players who may have been in the youth team, like Drameh. Because you may find that you have been moved on in the morning.

Drameh who had a fantastic spell at Cardiff, and was their Player of the Season, despite only going there on loan in January. Drameh, who along with many of the other players sent out on loan during 21-22, was welcomed back at the end of the season with the promise of a “clean sheet”. Players who we probably will never see in a Leeds shirt again, because the fans want BIG MONEY signings. We are a PL team after all. It is what is expected.

One in, one out. The dismantlement of the Bielsa Legacy continues. As I have said before, what message does this give to the youth team players? The Club are willing to splash the cash on a big squad of German / Austrian / French players, so the chance of getting a first team place is dwindling by the second. But surely, Bielsa was the one who didn’t value the Youth teams, wasn’t he? 

But this is what the fans want. And the fans know better, don’t they?

I fink I got it wrong again? We will just have to see how it goes for the rest of the season on the pitch.

Off the pitch? I could just copy and paste the wrongness that I have written of all season about poor decisions regarding matchday facilities and mobile ticketing etc. I’ve said it time and time again, the Club are not really bothered about matchgoing fans. The Club’s efforts are based on the larger population of non match going fans. This is the market and the money that the Club needs to tap into. It is a global enterprise after all.

What I will say is that at a time where people are choosing between heating and eating, where money is being stretched, the decision to stop print at home tickets is poor. Not everyone can afford a smartphone. People rely on work phones which they shouldn’t really use for football. Forcing people to get a smartphone just so they can go to watch football is poor form.

Is it really to stamp down on touting? Given it is so hard to get a ticket to watch us, I wonder how many people are selling their ticket on? Can it really be that many? 37,000 or so capacity. 22,000 season ticket holders and 2500 or so away fans. God knows how many corporate fans there are. There’s enough of them to fill up the East Stand lower upper tier though on a matchday. Taking all that into consideration, there can only be 6,000 normal tickets on any given matchday in the stands. Are there that many Leeds fans willing to skank fellow Leeds fans and sell on their tickets? You’d have thought that anyone lucky enough to get a ticket would actually be going to the game? Surely.

Which nicely brings me to the end of this latest rant. Who are the Club listening to? 

The fans who want the Club to spend big obviously. Even though, as we have seen from the likes of Everton, spending big does not necessarily translate into results. Newcastle, as previously mentioned, did not splash the spondoolies, yet are sitting pretty in 4th.

What is interesting is that the fan base over the last year have been split and are at risk of being further polarised. The division? Our manager. Even the players seem a bit put out. The news of the “senior players mutiny” couldn’t have been handled any less tactlessly than on the TV coverage of the Cardiff game. The cameras carelessly drifting over the faces of Dallas and Coops in the stands, as the commentators spoke of some dissent in the changing rooms. Was that a hint or what?  

Under Bielsa, Leeds players and fans alike, united together. In fact under Bielsa, not just the team united, the City of Leeds united. Yes, it helped that the football was good and something we hadn’t seen for ages, but, for a few seasons at least, we were united.

But that was the past, and the here and now is much much different.

The pity is that we have gone from being united under one manager; one belief, one entity, to being divided into those who like and those who don’t like old SkinnyJ. The ones who trust him and the ones who do not. And, as the saying goes, “never the twain will meet”. That’s Kipling for those of you who never did English Lit.

Everyone is allowed to have an opinion. The trouble is that in this brave New World 21st Century, if you don’t agree with someone, you get shouted down for daring to express your opinion. Especially if it goes against the “accepted” norm. You get lambasted as being an awful human being and, in terms of Leeds United, not a proper fan.

The sense of belonging that we had from 2018-2021 has dissipated into the ether. There is no sense of kinship, affinity and loyalty anymore. It’s Leeds, but not as we know it, Jim.

Instead we have division, because people just cannot accept that other people have their own views, and we agree to disagree like proper adults. No one is wrong or right, we are all just entitled to see things differently. It doesn’t make me a worse or better fan if I can’t get behind the manager. I don’t have to justify my thoughts to anyone. It is just what I think.

After all, who loyally stood behind the likes of Gary Monk, Darko Milanic, Uwe Rosler, Neil Redfearn (6 times), Brian McDermott, Steve Evans, Neil Warnock, Peter Reid, Dennis Wise (eek) EVERY time? Anyone? I don’t think so either.

Divide and conquer? Where have I heard that before? Hmmm. 2005?

Is this B*tes all over again, but bigger and on an international global scale? You heard it here first folks!  

If it is 21st Century B*tes all over again, what I will say is – bring it on, casinos and hotels and all. When Sad Santa came and tried to take Leeds away from me, I said this at the time. I was here before you, I am here now and I will be here long after you have gone. 

However long it takes, I will prevail, this is my team – not yours. 

Deadpool, and I don’t mean the occasionally humorous comic book hero film starring the Wrexham owner. That Deadpool film, which was a far better film than the earlier Mr Reynolds’, Green Lantern was much less entertaining than this one.

This is the last of the great Dirty Harry films from Clint Eastwood. The Deadpool storyline was that our hero, Harry somehow found himself on a list of celebrities which was part of a twisted gambling game to see which one was going to get knocked off next.

Not that I am saying that there is anything like that going on at Leeds United… but watch out Jack Harrison…

Regular readers will know, I am only joking, the ones with the red crosses on them have not been bumped off, some have genuinely left for good reasons (like warming a bench for £150k a week), but they are no longer with the club. The Bielsa Legacy has been systematically dismantled since our new manages arrival. Yes, I know, every manager will want to get their own players in, blah, blah, blah but who is left from the original Bielsa team? Meslier, Coops, Ayling, Dallas (if he ever gets back from injury), Llorente, Koch, Pascal, Bamford (if he ever gets free from injury), Harrison, Forshaw, Rodrigo and Joffy.

Remember this from the Leeds United official website?

How many are left from that team? I know, Pablo got old, Ben White was technically only on loan (and then went for big money to Arsenal). But not many, eh? Shacks, Gotts once touted as the new young guns, Dan James, Tyler all shipped out. Even the youth (u23 and 21s) like Cresswell, Leif Davis and their boss, Mark Tinkler have gone their merry ways.

Anyway, you all know that I am not a big fan of the manager. You all know that the whole “performance was more important than the points” thing really p*ssed me off. You all know how I hated this

So, it hasn’t taken much to rile me of late.

4 wins all season. Chelski and Livarpool, our two 2 “massive wins”. Forest and Brentford obviously took note of our game plan! Or maybe Livarpool and Chelski were missing their yet to be replaced leading lights, Mane and Rudiger? Wolves and Bournemouth are the other two. Massive failure to beat Wolves in the League Cup, despite Wolves being in a worse position than us and playing players with squad of numbers 71 and 88.

But Wednesday night, that took the biscuit.

Many of you had already left at the final whistle. It was midweek and a school night, most of you had work the next day or kids to take home. I don’t begrudge the ones who leave dead on the final whistle. Me, I like to stay for a while. I am glad I did.

At least I got to see Klichy leave the pitch for the final time in Leeds colours. That meant a lot. I was wondering what the heck was going on as it seemed a long final lap. Then I saw something on the big screen but couldn’t quite hear what Pablo was saying. Then I saw the T shirts and the guard of honour, and then the tears.

I had known for some time that Klich was going. He wasn’t getting a start and even though he made a massive impact when he came on, it was clear that our manager was never going to seriously play him. Klichy didn’t get into the Poland squad because he wasn’t getting enough game time. Which was correct. Why would you pick someone to play in the World Cup if they hadn’t actually been regularly playing for their league team? Unless you are Gareth Southgate of course. If Southgate was the Polish national manager it wouldn’t have mattered how much he had played, cos he would have just picked him anyway. Kalv.

So the writing (like the graffiti on the gates at the NE corner) was on the wall for Klichy anyway. He was never going to get picked over the perfect passing, silky skills and tubthumping tackles  of Roca, Aaronson and Adams.

But to not bother telling Leeds fans that this was his last game, even though the guys who printed those T shirts and the ones who put together the video montage knew it was, that was despicable.

Leeds United have done a lot of bad things in the last few years, but this was p*ss poor. Granted not as bad as sacking Bielsa, as that was unforgivable, but this ranks not far behind.

Surely the fans that Leeds United regularly communicate with would have told the people running the Club that Klich’s eventual departure would be something that really mattered to us. The fans that Leeds United engage with MUST have been aware how much Klich meant to all of us. The people that Leeds United talk to MUST have spelt out the disappointment of being deprived of seeing us win the league and the promised open top bus ride with the Championship trophy. The hurt of not giving Pablo and Beradi a decent send off, etc. etc. need I go on?

Leeds United must have known that Klich had a massive place in the hearts of all Leeds fans. Who else has had such a decent song in the last few years? Pablo and Kiko Casilla. Beradi. Pontus, and Klichy. So why weren’t we told? And why did he leave on Weds? The MLS league doesn’t start til later in the year? What was the rush?

Add this to the introduction of season tickets on people’s phones, the removal of the Pavilion facilities for normal match going fans, the push for cashless matchday refreshments and, not forgetting the “new crest”. Remember how they told us that the night we got promoted there would definitely NOT be any presentation of the trophy or any sort of celebration? Even though people had gone down early and seen an open top bus sat there ready for something that we had been assured would not happen? The debacle that is the lack of engagement and dialogue with ordinary matchgoing fans continues.

I was fuming, but where was the rest of the furore?

It petered out with people more concerned about the Gnonto song.

Really? Is that more important than completely ignoring one of our most influential and well liked players? You tell me.

But this was the kick in the bollocks when you are down.

We didn’t deserve this and Klichy deserved more for his loyalty and service to our Club.

But I am in a minority. I have been told that it must be the one in, one out way. We had to get rid of Dan James for Gnonto, didn’t we? So we are sacrificing Klich for another Red Bull player. Most people will be happy with that. Most people will be happy if he replaces the whole team with RB players, if it means we stay up.

Even if it means that the football continues to be beige, people will be happy. Because the league is more important than the Cup.

So when we go to Cardiff, with 6000 plus, and we lose, most Leeds fans will be happy with that. The league is more important.

Me? Wait for the next blog.

Houmous.

But we might win though…

January 3rd. Remember the date…

It seems like such a long time now. In terms of time and in terms of the football we are watching. Apologies for the fuzzy picture – Samsung for you! I think that today’s forecast of  maximum temp of 11 and minimum temp of 10 degrees is a bit misleading. Completely conflicting with the actual temperature outside this morning – which was bloody freezing. Full on windscreen scraping at 6.30am this morning! But it is January after all. Winter. Brrr.

Anyway, back to football

January 3rd 2010. The manager – Simon Grayson. The second to last manager we have had who was interested in a cup run. It’s a shame he didn’t do too well in the play off final though.  Our last manager to engage in cup run was the Mighty Steve Evans, who got us to the heady heights of the 5th round. I liked Steve Evans.

13 years on and where are we now? The gulf that divides Leeds and a decent Cup run has become so huge, it could well be described as a crevasse. Let’s not mince words – Mariana Trench. As is the gulf between the football we are playing and the football we were playing.

The recent years under Bielsa hasn’t helped. Even under him our Cup runs weren’t much to write home about, but his job was to get us promoted, which he did. The football we played the last season in the Championship and the 1st season in the PL was exceptional. The best I have seen us play in a long long time. Some of those games are probably the best games I have watched in real life. Certainly there were lots of heart stopping moments, both home and away, but I suppose beating Birmingham at St Andrews or that home game against West Brom? Probably still cannot beat the display in Monaco in 1995 though. Yeboah. Yeboah.

Either way, after drudgery of losing just 3-1 to Citeh at home ( I know, it could have been worse if Grealish had brought his shooting boots that day) and the stalemate at St James’s Park, the football we are enduring is hardly enough to light a sparkler, let alone a firework.

After watching the Brentford v Livarpool game last night and Chelski’s poor effort against Forest, no wonder we beat them. Our other two wins so far this season, were against Bournemouth and Wolves ( I think it was an own goal in the end?). But at least the teams below us are (up to press) worse than us, so my target of 16th this season is, us safe from relegation.

This is possibly THE most pessimistic I have been in a long long time. But at least I think we are safe from the drop. Purely because there are 6 teams (Bournemouth, Everton, West Ham, Forest, Wolves and Southampton) below us. I think I could maybe chuck in Leicester in the relegation dog fight too, so a bit more of a safety cushion there. Fingers crossed.

Whilst most, if not all other Leeds fans saw a brave defensive performance against Citeh, I’m afraid I just saw an off-the-pace De Bruyne and Grealish minus his shooting boots. Against Newcastle, even though I was a million miles from the pitch, we looked slow and narrow. But according to the manager, we “put in a solid display”. I may just have the January blues, but realistically I see nothing which makes me think we will be anything more than, well, 16th.

The only outstanding moments so far this season have been Meslier’s saves and Pascal’s efforts in front of goal. Meslier has kept us in it several times, and he managed to annoy the Barcodes on Saturday. Always a bonus.

Beige

In food terms, right now Leeds United are houmous. Beige but does the job.

At times under Bielsa, we were medium rare T bone steak, triple cooked chips in beef dripping, with a mountain of onion rings and just half a grilled tomato please. Sometimes we were a mega mix naan kebab with chilli and garlic mayo – exceptional times! But in the main, a decent ribeye steak, chips, onion rings and tomato (no mushrooms).

In the PL at the moment, Arsenal isn’t even rump steak let alone rib eye. Citeh are the equivalent of BBQ meat feast pan pizza hut delivery (sometimes right on time and toppings to the edge, other times 10 minutes late and not enough ham). Livarpool and Sc*m? Drive thru Big Mac Meal. Always full of hope that it will be as good as it looks on the picture, but in the main, limp soggy bread and overdone chips. Newcastle though, they are beginning to look like the roast beef dinner, with a giant Yorkshire pudding of the league this season.

Midtable Spurs, Brentford, Brighton etc. delectations are Drakes fish and chips, Wetherspoons big breakfast, Toby carvery, KFC bargain bucket and maybe the Mill Hill Doner. At the other end of the table, you have Southampton currently on the Asda smartprice veg pasty, with the rest of the bottom half ranging between Greggs vegan sausage roll, Cooplands 4 sausage rolls for £1.20, supermarket quiche and maybe reaching the heady heights of a Fray Bentos steak and kidney pie.

Us? Houmous.

And like all houmous, you could chuck a bit of money at it and go to town for Marks and Sparks / Waitrose / Sainsburys Taste The Difference red pepper stuff, but it’s just houmous. Even if Radrizzani does what the fans want him to do, and he splashes the cash in the transfer window, we’d still just be generic beige with an extra squeeze of lemon juice and a hint of garlic.

But this is good enough for most Leeds fans. Mid table and concentrating on the league season after season. No cup runs, no excitement, just beige.

It’s just not good enough for me. I’ve been spoilt by Bielsa.

But I’ve seen us worse.

Under Warnock we were the yellow stickered egg and cress sarnie in brown bread reduced to 10p. I’ll stay the course, like I always do and hope for better times ahead. If you don’t expect too much, you’re never going to be let down too harshly.

16th.

Until the new Messiah comes. Until then, we will always have the hope of January 3rd. I just hope it doesn’t take us another 13 years.

Well folks, it’s Cup football week and sadly, it’s the same old, same old AGAIN.

You may be asking why I would think anything different would happen this season. After all we’ve got a gruelling run up til Christmas of non stop long aways and we’re down at the bottom of the table, lower than our opponents, Wolves, so why would it be any different from any other season? We need to concentrate on the league surely, because we have had so many injuries at the start of the season and our players are exhausted after the intensity of the summer’s international tournaments. Right?

What’s that?

We don’t have an imminent terrible run of long aways? No one told me that after Spurs there was going to be a 6 week break for most of the team because of some tournament? Really? 6 weeks more or less of no games? Has anyone told Leeds United about this?

But surely our opposition on Wednesday were better than us and we wouldn’t stick a chance?

What???

Are Wolves below us in the league? Wolves don’t even have a proper manager? That one has passed me by. Nah, that can’t be right. Wolves have got a worse record than us since the start of the season? Eh? But haven’t we had a horribly depleted team full of injuries because Murderball and Bielsa is too much for them? Bielsa got sacked in February?

WHAAAT?

On paper we should have won that game on Wednesday. The Wolves fans were thinking that they were going to have their arses well and truly  whopped before the game.

What did we do?

We lost.

But “nevermind guys, it was a good performance, and we were really unlucky”. “They were a far more experienced team. The young guys played really well”. I think Ayling, Harrison and Klich might have had some experience getting us promoted to the PL, or did Take Me Home get that wrong? Mind you – they were playing in their right positions for most of that time.

These are the line ups

And these were the subs. Pay extra attention to the two Wolves subs who got played, shirt numbers 77 and 81

Vastly more experienced team? You are having a giraffe.

This was the subs bench at the Citeh v Chelski game

Do you notice anything different?

I admit, they have bigger squads, but how many of those players will be representing their country in the Slavery World Cup too and have been having that extra pressure on them? Citeh have Brentford and Chelski have the newly resurgent Bar Codes tomorrow. But they still put out a decent bench and Conti played Kane, even though he’s had his work cut out since Son has been injured.

In summary, we had an unusually winnable game at Wolves on Wednesday.

Unusually, there were plenty of tickets for the game on Weds, because it wasn’t a massive “glamour tie”, so parents and kids hoping to see their heroes, were able to get tickets. Judging by the number of unfamiliar faces I saw on Weds, there were quite a few there who had been lucky enough to get a ticket, that don’t normally go away.

Unusually, the game came on the back of a bit of a good run. Despite people on the day of the Liverpool game actually saying they wanted Dyche, after our win, it was all BRILLIIIANT again. Even though Liverpool were less than ordinary and are still suffering from the departure of Mane to the Bundesliga.

Even betterer, we then go on to beat Bournemouth, after overturning a 3-1 deficit, with …. wait for it ….. substitutions which changed the starting formation! A novel idea if I ever saw one. How refreshing it was to see a corner being taken without two grown men whispering to each other like characters in a Jane Austen book. Honestly, sometimes I think all it would take would be a couple of ribboned bonnets and corsets, Colin Firth to come striding out of the North East Corner in his undies, topped off with Emma Thompson overacting, and it could be Pride & Prejudice or set piece Sense and Sensibility. Oooh Mr Darcy!

So SkinnyJeans has been catapulted, as they say in the USA, from zero to hero. The inspired subs of Willy “he’s not ready for the PL until at least January” Gnonto and Greenwood have propelled us to a massive 12th. 15 points already and only another 24 points needed to secure us PL safety ( I hope). Over a third of the way there, and it’s not even Christmas – with a game in hand.

With Wolves and Forest thankfully having a truly terrible start, we are sitting pretty on top of the 6 remaining relegation fodder teams, PLUS we have that game in hand. So what was wrong with at least trying to get a couple of cup games in, and maybe get a decent home draw to make some money in before Christmas? A full house a ER in the run up to Christmas would have got Leeds some money in from all the kids wanting extra tat in for Christmas. They could have sold a load more of those mass manufactured Xmas jumpers made in the sweatshops in the Far East, and probably raked in a bit more in food and drink to boot. Maybe add a few more £75 memberships and a few more onto that season ticket wait list. £££s or should it be $$$?

What’s wrong with gaining a bit of winning momentum? Three wins in three?

But he just couldn’t do it though. And the keyboard warriors all just went along with the narrative of “let’s stay focused on the league”. 

What have our miserable failings due to fielding weakened sides done for us in the last 20 years? I can forgive Bielsa to an extent because his job was to get us promoted. Apart from the last season where the Board probably were wanting him to get dumped out of the domestic cups sooner, to give them an excuse to give him the boot quicker.

What have our early exits achieved in the last two decades?

Jack all. Apart from managing to piss off every fan who dragged their sorry arses (when they could get tickets because the ground-hoppers were desperate to tick a box) to the likes of Histon, Sutton, Newport etc. 

“First it was the League Cup and before so very long”

Well at this rate, it will be another 50 years before we get to Wembley in a Cup final. Realistically, how else would we get into Europe again? We can’t match the moneymen in the Top 6 for a Chumpions League spot. A win in the Cup could get us to playing Sc*m in the heady heights of the Europa League Final. If we could be bothered that is. This season we could have done a bit more, but same old, same old.

What is wrong with a bit of aspiration? What is wrong with a bit of pride in yourself and passion for the game?

Where would the world be without people who dare to be different, break away from the shackles of normality and put their heads above the parapet? You’d like to think that there are parents and teachers out there who inspire and encourage the young to better themselves. When I was little, it was drilled into me to not just accept stuff without question because I was told to do it. That to simply follow the crowd and accept what was going on wasn’t good if it felt was wrong. I was taught to fight for my beliefs and challenge those who would try and convince me otherwise.

Not to be though, and the keyboard warriors just toed the line and defended everything. And when they couldn’t defend it anymore, they just started with the name calling and insults.

If there is anything that annoys me, it is those Entitled super-fans who feel that they are “more Leeds” than others. No one is any better than anyone else. We are all just Leeds. In some people’s heads though, some are more Leeds than others. 

These are the ones who without any thought or consideration like to chuck insults around to anyone who dares to disagree with them. They have no accountability for their actions or comments, and are just as likely to be screaming for the managers / boards (delete as appropriate) heads one week and then claiming them to be the best thing since sliced bread the next. There’s nothing wrong with changing your mind, but no doubt the ones for example who were sending death threats to players a few seasons back and claiming that none of them were fit to wear the shirt, were all at ER at the open top bus thing celebrating along with Amazon when we got promoted. Similarly the ones wanting SkinnyJ out before Liverpool, probably posted that hugging heart emoji on the video of his post match interview pledging their undying allegiance to him.

Some idiot was laughing at people who went to the game (stupidly) thinking we would win. This fool clearly has no idea that there is a cost of living crisis going on, where every penny counts. And clearly has no empathy for any poor parents who have forked out hard earned money to take their kid to watch their heroes play football. Only to see that disappear in a cloud of complacency and apathy. It is still difficult to get time off work, it is still difficult to get an away ticket. Unless of course, you have the luxury of having enough money to do whatever you want. But you’d think if you did have all that, you’d be a little bit mindful of people less fortunate.

The only thing that riles me more than these imbeciles, are the ones who deliberately stand in your seat at away games and refuse to move on when asked. The ones who “are Leeds United and we’ll stand where we want”. Pushing old people and kids around so they can stand with their mates on their big day out until we start losing. Then they skulk off down to the bogs to do whatever it is that they do in there. The ones with complete disregard for anyone else who actually just wants to watch the game. Because they think that everyone should be like them or they ” aren’t proper Leeds fans”. Even though some of us have been going to games before these were managing to get through the night without wetting the bed. 

We turn up. We watch the game. We celebrate if we win and moan when we lose. It is just how it always is. We pay our money, we have a right to disagree. No need to take the p*ss out of people who just want to see us win, because ultimately, surely that’s what we all want, isn’t it?

Here’s to a FA Cup run in January. Fingers crossed. Unless it is the same old, same old

 

After the weekend, I had no choice but to write this. Because unless you weren’t at the game and couldn’t hear the South Stand, or haven’t seen the video already (which I am not going to share – cos it’s a bit sensitive), it was life imitating art (sort of). I wrote this (see below excerpt) in the last blog, and there it was on Saturday. We start scoring more than two goals in the game and someone starts a song off about Willy Gnonto

I had to laugh, because this may well be the new song for the rest of the season. That is of course, if someone doesn’t report it for being offensive and un-pc, leading to it being cancelled. And rather than it being a small section of the crowd, most heard it and joined in with it (apart from the Offended). And the supposition that Gnonto drinks moretti, eats spaghetti and …. I just can’t write it … was shared over social media. I think we have the Gen Z Enoch Showumni!

Praise to the South Stand from me is rare, mostly because you know my opinion of the “limbs” thing. But whether or not the instigators of the song had actually read my last blog, or whether they just have the same bizarre culturally misappropriative mindset that I have, it was too much of a coincidence. It was life imitating art. Should you find that sort of thing funny – it was funny.

However, if he stops scoring (unlikely) or if the higher powers that be decide that it pushes the boundaries a little too much (more likely) – that may well be the last time we hear that song. But well done. A sturdy pat on the back to you – whoever you are.

The song, like parts of the second half, harked back to some semblance of the days of football past, when we played proper football. I’m not saying that Gnonto and Summerville are the finished article, far from it. Anyone who has spoken to me recently knows how much I think there are bits of Yeboah about Gnonto already. No, I am referring to when we used to be able to pass a ball to one another, in fact string a few decent passes together.

It took the despair away from the mighty mess which was the 1st half at least. I know I have moaned about Leeds fans being fickle, but it was a challenge, even for me, to see any positive in the first 45 minutes. We were dire.

Like we have seen many, many times before we were ridiculously narrow, no wide options to pass the ball to going forward and our midfield, again, were none existent when they hit us on the break. We gifted the equaliser and the second goal, well, no comment. A fair few missed the stroll up the park which was the 3rd goal, as they were too busy enjoying themselves in the bar. Thankfully Greenwood coming on made a massive difference. The rest is history as they say.

We won, and after beating the Scousers and smashing Dick Van Dijk’s defensive record, it seems all is forgiven and we are, once again, heading for a place in Europe.

The master-plan is back on track and everyone who was hoping for Dyche before the Liverpool game, has now been convinced that SkinnyJeans is our next big hope again for Premiership glory. This is all good news for the board, and of course, SkinnyJ. He has got his reprieve, and despite the pre Liverpool panic and doom, it is all back to the rose garden. Everyone is smiley, smiley again.

Unfortunately for Harrison, the disassembling and dismantlement of the Bielsa Boys legacy is also back on track. If only Rodrigo would just stop scoring, that would be the next step complete for the transformation. He remains our top goal scorer, so no chance of that anytime soon.

Whilst Gnonto and Summerville ascending is ultimately brilliant for the club, it spells the end for Harrison and Rodrigo. Harrison will go to Newcastle, where Howe will play him as a proper winger. With a proper defence behind him and a target man and a number 10 at Newcastle, Harrison will do well. He may not be as young as Willy and Crysencio, but he has a good footballing head and when he plays in his correct position, as in the Bielsa team, he will be an asset.

Rodrigo is a brilliant player, but he is not a fans favourite. He will hit as many wayward crosses and miss as many shots as the Aaronson / Adams / Rasmus combination will, but Rodrigo will be slated for them, unlike the others. He will be subbed, even when he doesn’t need to be, when others won’t.

Whilst everyone will complain that he is rubbish and the defence is crap, it will continue to deflect from the truth that midfield is our weakest link. Even though Struijk isn’t a left back, he has done a cracking job. Even though our backline has supplied the large majority of our crosses, and even Coops has scored a goal, they are still at fault for our losses. The fact that they are encouraged to go so far forward, therefore resulting in them having to leg it back when we get hit on the break, escapes the attention of most. We have no defensive midfielders. No Phillips, no Batty-esque players, so why are people surprised that we hand goals to the opposition on a plate?

But this is how we play now, and it has worked because we beat Liverpool and Chelsea and Bournemouth. Hasn’t it? Who cares about our defensive line, because we are winning. Correct? Who needs a team with one touch passing and creative midfielders? Who needs a solid back four? Like Bonnie Tyler – we just need a hero.

Unfortunately this means that we will be watching sport how sport in the movies is played. This is when the hero gets the ball and heads towards goal with “Chariots of Fire” being played in the background. The scorer has to the goal in sight, his team mates around him throwing themselves at the opponents to stop them getting to him, and finally after the epic run, he shoots – he scores. Everyone runs to the hero. Glory Glory Hallelujah! Limbs all round.

It is formulaic and it fits the narrative.

Give me Lee Chapman any day of the week.